March 1, 2009
The amount of anger I am experiencing at this moment is unexplainable. I can’t write for long, as I have a lot happening right now. This is the first time I have felt the full potential of my vampire-strength, the first time since being turned that I have considered killing a human.
Charlie was shot in the line of duty yesterday.
A group of punks made their way to Forks from Seattle in an attempt the run from the police there. They were involved in a shooting in Seattle, and killed two people.
Charlie was on duty and got a call regarding ‘suspicious behavior’ occurring about one kilometre from the diner. A witness stated that as soon as Charlie arrived on the scene, as soon as he stepped out of his cruiser, he was shot.
Once in the lung. Once in the right shoulder, and once in his chest – so close to his heart that Carlisle said if it shifted at all, it could stop his heart.
The criminals are still out there, too. Edward has been trying to read peoples thoughts all day to find out where they are. He wants to turn them in. I, however, want to kill them. Edward keeps reminding me of what could happen if I did anything to harm the humans, but I just don’t know if I can stop myself. This desire to kill, this anger, is overwhelming. It’s eating away at me. I cannot let them get away with what they have done to my Father. For nearly taking his life.
I don’t know what I’m going to do once we track them down. I can’t trust myself.
In the meantime, I’m heading back to the hospital to speak to Carlisle about Charlies progress, and to be by Charlies side. Nessie, Edward, Jacob, Alice, Rosalie, Emmett, Esme and Sue are there already. I came home for a few hours to gather myself… the smell of blood in the hospital became hard for me to handle. I’ll up date you on Charlie’s progress when I can.
I have some punks to go hunt down.
I hope we find them soon…