Dear Diary (Still The Same)

August 10, 2009

Nothing has really changed in Charlie’s house since Rene left—years ago. Other than the new flat screen TV and, of course, the new purple color-scheme in my now ‘pretend’ room, everything is pretty much the same. It’s still the same small, two bedroom house with one bathroom at the top of the stairs. There is still a sequence of pictures of me getting older, and Charlie and Renee’s wedding picture above the small fireplace in the family room. The kitchen cabinets are the same bright yellow color that Renee had painted them years ago, before she left, in an attempt to bring some sunshine into the house.

I thought I saw Renee’s jaw drop for a second as she scanned the house, noticing how similar it was to before she left. Her eyes kept meeting back with the wedding photo of her and Charlie on top of the fireplace, and I knew she thought it carried some sort of significance. She was right, too. Edward has heard Charlie thinking about Renee and their past on more than one occasion. He has always felt as though he failed Rene—and me—for not keeping the family together. I’ve always known it wasn’t his fault, though.

Charlie was still out hunting when Renee got to the house. He figured he should go right before she arrived, just to be safe. I was the only one there to meet her. Edward planned to join me once Renee was settled in, but before Charlie got there. He wanted to be there when Renee saw Charlie for the first time since his change. We figured that because Charlie didn’t have a hard time dealing with the scent of human blood to the extent that most newborns do, that he would do well around Renee.

We figured wrong.

When Charlie stepped through the front door of the house, he instantaneously clasped one hand over his nose and mouth. His eyes were a deep brown, thanks to the contacts, and he squinted like someone would if they were looking directly into the sun. I knew immediately what was happening. I had a vague flashback to the first time Edward tried to restrain from killing me because my scent was too tempting to him. I knew that Renee’s scent was stronger and sweeter to Charlie—causing his throat to feel like a freshly fueled fire pit.

I jumped swiftly between Charlie and Renee, careful not to move inhumanly fast; we couldn’t risk sending Renee’s mind and suspicion into overdrive. Edward was reading Charlie’s thoughts and mouthed the words, ‘He’s not going to hurt her’ to me, and I relaxed, un-clenching my fists—which had rolled into balls without me noticing.

Charlie’s hand dropped from his face and he guardedly half-smiled at Renee, who’s face was now more rosy than it was before Charlie walked through the door. Her cheeks flushed and her eyes were almost double their normal size. She was clearly taken back by Charlie’s newly polished appearance, and I was hoping she wouldn’t make a big deal over it. However, she did.

Edward shot me a half-grin when Renee compared Charlie to a vampire. “You are so pale Charlie, looks like living in Forks brings out the vampire in everyone, the lack of sunshine and all, you know . . . ”

Renee held her arm out next to mine to make note of the difference in color between her perfectly tanned skin and my porcelain skin. Her skin brushed against mine and she made a disimpassioned comment about my skin feeling cold next to hers. Luckily she just told me to put a sweater on and then moved onto the next topic before I even had a chance to get a word out.

The look on Edward’s face was confusing me. It was a mix between disgust and discombobulation. I could tell he wanted to tell me something. I figured I’d find out sooner or later and ignored the unusual expression. I assumed that reading minds is not always a good thing from the look on Edward’s face, and half-laughed to myself.

Renee’s visit was an eventful one, to say the least. Lets just say the unexpected happened, and she will be returning to Forks for another visit very soon. I will let you all know what happened in detail in the next entry. For now, I can tell you that Edward’s expression was understandable. Once we were alone, he explained what thoughts were going through Renee’s head when she saw Charlie for the first time since he was turned.

I won’t go into detail, but she liked what she saw—causing her mind to wander. I laughed sympathetically when Edward told me, and apologized for my mother. His grin was more conspicuous than usual, curling up equally on both sides. He shook his head, obviously embarrassed, before pulling me closer to him, wrapping his perfect arms around me.

Like most days, it’s gloomy and rainy in Forks, so Alice is taking Renesmee and I shopping for clothes. Nessie goes through clothes so fast because she keeps growing out of everything. Wish me luck. We all know how Alice gets with shopping and clothes. Nessie and I will probably come back with more clothing than we have room for.


EDIT: Looking for a new dark love story to read? I have written a novella called, ‘My Darrling.’ (This is not the Willow series I’ve been working on, rather it’s a small side project.). You can read a preview and purchase ‘My Darrling’ here!


Be My Friend


Hey there! My name is Autumn and I wrote Bella's Diary. I'm also the website's owner/creator.
Some of you may know me as 'Krystal,' but I recently legally changed my name to Autumn, so I hope that clears up any confusion.
I like to do a lot of things, but I'm a writer first and foremost. It's my true passion. Feel free to check out my debut novella, 'My Darrling' on Goodreads here!
I'm also currently writing my own vampire/supernatural book series, and I'll keep you updated on that here once I know more.
I'm friendly, so make use of those social icons and feel more than free to add me! Thank you for visiting
P.S. I'm team Edward. ;)
Be My Friend