mydarrling


Jealousy

June 18, 2010


Dear Diary,

I guess you can say things have been very boring around here.

I mean, after Demetri ‘joined’, besides keeping an eye on him, nothing has been any different. We haven’t caught any new scents lately, so that means normal patrol times. I actually came back from patrol yesterday, and was going to spend it with Ness.

“Hm. I’ve never heard that one before.” I heard Ness say, as I walked through the woods to the Cullens’ back yard.

“Yes, it really is.” I heard a soft chuckle, and I saw Demetri sitting on a blanket next to Ness, who was giggling under his arm.

I mean, I like Demetri and all, but I felt those familiar emotions flood through me when I registered the scene in front of me. Jealousy and possessiveness. I muffled the growl coming up, and sauntered over to them. Demetri immediately removed his arm from her shoulder, and I glared.

“Hey, babe,” I said loudly, then I plopped down next to her, wrapping my arm lazily over her shoulder possessively. I looked up to see Demetri’s brow furrowed momentarily, but his face became expressionless within a second.

“Demetri.” I mumbled curtly, nodding my head in his direction. He nodded slightly, and got up.

“Well, I think I’ll go hunting now. Farewell, Renesmee. Jacob.” I watched him speed to the trees, and Ness slapped me on the arm after he was gone.

“Jake!” She scolded, and I held my hands up.

“What?” I asked, and she rolled her eyes.

“You know what, you big idiot! He’s new to this family, you need to be nice!” she said, and I frowned.

“He was all over you Ness, how could you not see it?” I asked her, and she sighed.

“Jake, really. You’re probably the only guy who would find me attractive. So, if I were you, I’d chill. Don’t worry. He had a wife, and he’s still not over her. In fact, that’s what we were discussing.” She told me snippily. I rubbed her arm.

“Ness, I may not be able to read minds, but every guy that sees you wants you. Sorry for being a bit protective with you,” I mumbled, looking down. I felt her small hand pull my face up to look at her. She was showing me images of her, and her with me, and the how she only wore a smile in the images with me.

“Jacob, don’t worry, okay?” She said, kissing me softly on the lips. I bit the inside of my cheek, and nodded slightly. She has such an effect on me.

By the time I finally relaxed, it was getting dark, so we decided to head in, before the wind got too cold. Ness went up to take a shower before bed, and I settled in on the couch. I still felt tension coursing through me, even though I shouldn’t worry, I still do.

“Stop worrying, you worry-wart.” I heard Alice say, breezing in the room.

“Hey, midget, I didn’t know you could read minds.” I said. She glared at me.

“Seeing the future has it’s advantages, mutt,” Alice shot back. I laughed, and she cracked a smile.

“But really, Jake. I might not be able to see you, but I see Ness. Nothing is going to happen, and you’ll be fine. Gosh, I thought Jazz was protective,” She said, laughing like a little wind chime. I nodded, and she pursed her lips.

“All that tension you’re putting on yourself will give you premature wrinkles, so I’d suggest you stop, Jakey.” I watched her flash out of the room before I could throw a couch pillow at her. I knew deep down Alice was right; not about the wrinkles, but the part about everything being okay, even when I don’t get all possessive. I mean, hey, it’s my natural instinct to feel jealousy when I see my imprint laughing with a single vampire. Demetri seems cool, but I feel a pang of anger towards him, so I know I’ll feel strained around him from now on.

Ness came down to say goodnight, her sweet pomegranate scent intensified by the shower, and we had a small make out session before she headed up to bed.

I left the Cullens’ a few minutes later, and made my way back to my house. Of course I didn’t sleep well, considering that even after all the talking I did on the situation, I still felt upset. I know I sound like a chick, being all emotional, but I can’t help but realize that this is going to happen, all the time. I also know I’m overreacting, because it’s not like he was kissing her or anything, but I feel like I should be the only one making her laugh like that. Does that sound creepy? Jeez, I know, I know, stop over thinking this. I feel like the emo leech, Jasper, with my emotions feeling like a roller coaster. I feel guilty for being mean to Demetri, but I feel anger to him that he was making moves on Ness. I feel sad that she cares for enough that I shouldn’t be mean to him, but I feel mad that she does at the same time.

But when I look at this from a different point of view, it really wasn’t much. I mean, Ness talked to Demetri. He’s living with the Cullens, so of course they’re going to talk. But the way he looked at her…I don’t know. I just don’t like it.

Then I remembered what the little pixie told me. Nothing is going to happen in the future, so I should be okay. As soon as I remembered that, I fell asleep, even though I slept with my muscles flexed.

I woke up to my phone ringing, and it was Sam.

“Hey, Jake.” I heard him say.

“What’s up, Sam?” I asked, sitting up.

“Well, I hope you don’t mind patrolling at a different time?” He asked.

“What time?” I questioned.

“In about an hour.” He told me.

“Damn, that means I can’t see Ness today.” I frowned.

“Well, Kim wanted to go look at flowers or something for the wedding, so she dragged Jared along with her. He was hoping you would cover,” Sam explained.

“Yeah, man. That’s fine,” I said, and I got up to find some cutoffs to pull on over my boxers.

“Jared was wondering if you could ask Edward if he would play the piano, or whatever the thing he plays at the wedding,” Sam said. I chuckled.

“Yeah it’s the piano, and I’m sure he will,” I told Sam. We discussed crap about Kim and Jared’s wedding for a minute, and he let me go.

By the time I had ate breakfast, it was about time for me to go patrol, so I texted Ness letting her know the plans.

I have to go now, I spent my remaining time writing in this little girly book.

- Jacob

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