(Jacob’s Diary) School Daze

July 9, 2011

Dear Diary,

Yesterday was our first day of school here in England. Just let me tell you, these people are just…too polite. I can’t even burp without getting glared at by the “Professor.”

Not teacher; professor.

The chicks are digging me too, not that I really notice. I only have eyes for my wife. She had to switch her wedding ring to her other hand though, and so did I, just in case somebody noticed. It’s really hard because guys think she’s available and try making moves on her.

Let’s just say after today, people will know that we’re together, and that Ness is off limits to them. Ness also gave a few death glares of her own. That never gets old. Who would’ve thought British people were so horny?

I mean, I do understand our whole family is undeniably attractive especially me. Nessie too, but I’m talking guy–wise here. I win in that department.

They obviously don’t know boundaries. We all make it clear that we’re dating and I mean, I had my arm around Nessie every chance I got.

I got seriously pissed when some idiot decided to try to smack Ness’s butt.

Hell no.

I remember darting my eyes to him, making almost visible daggers. His smirk disappeared, and he shrunk under my gaze. He was sitting at lunch with the rest of the lacrosse team, and I guess he was trying to impress them. I was only aware of him getting ready to do it because of my acute hearing.

“Hey, watch this! I bet I can smack that new girls bum…and she’ll like it!” he said, and the rest of the team was watching. His hand was two inches away from it before I stomped right in front of him.

Nessie was oblivious, walking to the lunch table that the Cullens had claimed. I flexed my arm muscles subconsciously and  bared my teeth. Once he had fell out of his chair, I sauntered off with a final possessive glare.


The majority of the cafeteria watched in amusement and I was proud of causing him embarrassment.

Edward gave me a high five, and the rest of us started talking about how many times they were approached today. Which was a lot.

Each of us got an abundance of phone numbers and propositions.

Other than that, it wasn’t a very eventful first day. Classes were boring, and way harder than ones back in America. The professors were a pain in the ass, and my grammar got corrected more times than I could count and not just by the teachers, but also by students.

Stupid proper languages and fancy accents.

I made sure to use the word “ain’t” every chance I got. As for the rest of the gang, this wasn’t anything new. Well besides Nessie, of course. For her and I, this was a brand new experience.

I didn’t have to do my homework either; one of the Cullens would. I told them I would go to school as long as I didn’t have to do the homework. Surprisingly, they didn’t mind. Homework never takes any time for them to do, and since being a werewolf doesn’t include becoming a super genius, doing homework would suck. I didn’t graduate high school to do it all again, especially without a brain that could put Stephen Hawking to shame.

So, I have to endure tests, and lectures, but it isn’t that hard. It also gives me something interesting and new to do during the day, plus it gives me a chance to meet new people. That’s what Carlisle said. Even though I only talk to the Cullens, though. Everyone else acts like we’re gods and the plague, all at the same time.

Did I mention this school also has uniforms? Well it does, and it sucks. I have to wear dress pants, and a “jumper” – everyday. It has it’s benefits though. Nessie looks hot in a plaid skirt and knee highs. We use the uniforms at night, too.

School doesn’t start until nine-thirty, though. Compared to it starting at seven-fifty on the rez. That’s an improvement. Speaking of the rez, Emily is pregnant. Sam had stopped phasing when they moved back –wanting to age with Emily– and he also became part of the tribe’s council, along with my dad and Sue. Seth has imprinted and is getting married. From now on, I’ll being hearing about these things while I’m across the world. I guess that’s how it’s meant to be.

I patrol every now and then and I haven’t come across any fresh scents. The vampire activity here is seriously lacking. It’s nice. Not near as many worries, and a lot more free time at night.

I’ve video–called my dad a few times and it wasn’t that difficult. It was actually really cool and it made me feel a little closer to home. Moving to New Hampshire was hard, but this is a different story. Nessie’s gotten over it, and I’m now starting to feel a tinge of homesickness. I don’t show it though – I don’t want Ness getting upset over it again when she has calmed down and stopped going HGTV on our house. Which looks right fantastic if you ask me.


These redcoats are rubbing their sayings off on me. Thank god for cable television and redneck shows to give me some balance.

Nessie likes school though, she’s made a few friends and she loves her music class. She’s always liked piano, but she’s never really pursued playing it unless she was hanging out with Edward. Apparently, this course is enlightening.

Bells and I hang out a lot because we have three classes together; three I don’t have with Ness. She’s a major help as a lab partner, and sits in front of me to help in the other two classes. I’m not stupid or anything, academics just aren’t my strong point, especially since it’s been a while since I’ve been in school.

It’s nice talking to her though. We don’t really get to have best friend time anymore because we’re always with the rest of the family or Edward’s lurking around.

I’ve missed Bella.

We talk a lot about Ness and music –and anything else that comes to mind. Easy conversations that best friends have.

Gym was fun. All of these guys are really lanky and used to light exercises. I’m extremely buff compared to them – and even everyone on their little lacrosse and “football” team. Ha, football! Football is definitely not using your feet to kick around a black and white ball that’s soccer. Duh. Whatever.

I walked into the gym and their little knobby knees were quivering. Well, one pair of knees in particular…the one who thought that Ness would enjoy him smacking her bum. He saw me and his already- pale skin turned white.

So, yeah – I showed off in gym. I practically clapped between my push-ups. That’s right, jackass. His face was priceless.

Once school was over, Ness and I drove home in my new black Camaro. I traded in my old car because the new model Camaro was just…amazing. Great horsepower and beautiful engineering inside. I got it with blacked out rims and black leather interior. Tinted windows, too.

It’s kickass.

I got envious looks from everyone.  I noticed Nessie got some glares from girls. She didn’t care, she thought it was funny that girls were so jealous of her and her “boyfriend.” I don’t very much like that word. I prefer husband. Or even when she calls me her “hubby.” I’ll just have to get used to it, I guess.

After we got back from school, the guys and I played paintball in the woods, which I surprisingly did pretty good in considering my lack of super speed and extremely acute senses – since I can’t play paintball as a werewolf. I fared well, though, because my senses are heightened regardless and I have a knack for COD.

Nessie went shopping again. Apparently, there’s a mall with the best stores, and like, so many designers to be a mall.

It’s a shame I can’t wear any of the clothes Ness has bought for me though, unless it’s a weekend, but whatever. This town does have a movie theater and a Walmart. A few restaurants too.

School has been kinda plain, but different at the same time. This is high school though, so I’m sure drama and cat-fights and stuff will happen. It’ll be a little more entertaining. Until then, it’s time to go. Ness is waiting in the car and I have school soon.

- Jacob

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