(Jacob’s Diary) Panic Room

October 8, 2011

Luca swiftly walked into the woods, leaving the clan behind. He would come back soon — but first, a plan had to be compiled. This one-of-a-kind creature would be too delectable, and his pack was just as hungry for the being as Luca was.

They knew the threat of trying to capture her. They knew the clan of vampires would be highly strong, and the risks of trying to take them on. Being as they were, they didn’t care.


Dear Diary,

My eyes have ached from the lack of sleep I’ve gotten lately.
We’ve bought multiple things to prepare the pack of werewolves and we’ve even been practicing at the shooting range. The Cullens have ordered Wolfsbane and silver bullets and shit, but regardless of how prepared we were, it didn’t relieve any of my stress.

All I was thinking about was what would happen if I did die? What if I die, and the others can’t protect her? Carlisle kept urging for me and Ness to go to Isle Esme, while they stay and “hold up fort.” These wolves can follow a scent though. They want Ness, not the Cullens. I’m sure as hell not making the same mistake Edward and I made with Bella when Victoria was after her. She knew that Bella wouldn’t be at the battlefield. I’m sure these guys aren’t stupid enough to think we’d have her at the battlefield. So I’m going to fight with them, and Bella is going to stay with Ness in the basement.

The Cullens’ basement had an old panic room and Carlisle ordered some fancy equipment to make it impossible to get in, or something. It’s got some big ass titanium door and the control panel is on the inside, powered by a generator so the wolves can’t cut the power and mess it up. They went in the panic room that morning, because we didn’t know if the pack would try to come as humans, or wait until that night.

The night before, Ness was rubbing my shoulders, complaining about how tense I was.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I’m just a little bit stressed,” I said, rubbing my eyes and temples.

She scratched my back. “It’ll be fine, Jake. We’re good at beating the bad guys, and you know it.”

I turned my head around to face her and a sign escaped me. She was upset too, and I could see it.

“I can’t let anything happen to you,” I said stroking her cheek.

She kissed my nose. “Do you think I feel good about you being out there while I’m in a padded room with my mom, not knowing if you’re alright or not?” She asked, and I looked down. “I can’t lose you either, Jake,” she continued.  “It’s a two way street here.” Ness put a finger under my chin and pulled my head up to face her. She moved around and sat on my lap, gripping my face in her hands.
“I love you so much, Jacob.”

Tears prickled at my eyes, and she kissed me softly. I wasn’t even ashamed for crying. She pulled back and two big tears rolled down her cheeks, causing my eyes to completely well up now.

I hugged her to me, gripping her as tight as I could without breaking her. She sobbed into my shoulder, and I cried into her hair. We spent the night crying and hugging each other, trying to not think about the next day.


That morning, Nessie pulled on a pair of sweats and tied her hair up, while I put on a pair of black jeans and a black long-sleeved shirt. Black seemed like a good fighting color.

Ness ate a bowl of cereal silently and grabbed about ten books, and her laptop.
When she finished, she stood against a wall awkwardly, staring off into space, her eyes red and swollen. I watched her from the kitchen, my heart hurting enough to make me feel sick. After a few seconds, I couldn’t stand it anymore, and I went over to her, pulling her to me. Her body collapsed against me and I gripped her tightly.

“It’ll be alright, honey. I promise,” I assured her, kissing the top of her head. Her body started shaking and she was crying into my chest. I felt her tears wetting my shirt — her breathing turned fast and erratic. My eyes got glassy and I stroked her hair.

“Don’t cry, baby. Please.”

She sniffled loudly, and hugged me in a vice grip. “Just come to the basement with me and mom, p-p-please?” She begged. Her eyes were red and wet as she looked up at me.

I looked down at her, and felt my heart break. “I can’t just leave our family to fend for themselves. They can’t do it without me, Ness. You know that,” I told her. I ached to stay with her, but my better judgment was telling me to stand by our family.

She’d be safe.

Her lip trembled, and I stroked my thumbs under her eyes. “I have to stand by our family. You’ll be fine,” I said, and she shook her head.

“B-but, you won’t! I’m not okay unless you are!” She shouted and more tears poured out of her eyes.

I pursed my lips, aching to just give in to her. “I’ll be fine, I promise.”

I kissed her eyes, her cheeks, her nose and her lips before hugging her to me tightly. “I love you,” I said, and she nodded, sniffling.

“I love you too, Jake,” she cried.

When we walked outside, Bella was there waiting. She hugged me tightly when we approached her. “Please stay safe,” she whispered in my ear. I nodded tersely and ignored her sickly sweet scent, and cold, granite skin.

“I love you, Jake,” Bella told me, kissing my cheek.

“I love you too,” I said.

“Ready to go, honey?” Bella asked Ness cheerfully. Ness glared daggers at her.
“Never mind, then,” Bella said, pulling Ness with her.

I followed behind them and watched as Bella threaded her fingers through Nessie’s, rubbing reassuring circles on her hand with her thumb, while I stuck my hands in my pockets, trying to ignore the pain in my chest.

All of the Cullens were in the living room when we entered the main house. I swallowed the lump in my throat then greeted everyone. They were all hugging Ness, and reassuring her that everything would be okay.

Edward was giving me a confused look the entire time. So when Alice starting talking to Nessie about something, Edward pulled me into the kitchen.

“Why don’t you stay with her down in the basement?” he questioned me.

“She’ll be safe in there, and Edward, do you really expect me to leave my family out there?”

Edward’s eyebrows knitted together and he put a firm hand on my shoulder. “That’s really an honest decision, Jacob. We would understand if you wanted to stay in there with Renesmee, but that takes a real brave man to make that decision. I want you to know that we all appreciate it, and love you greatly. You are part of this family — and we’re glad that we’re part of yours.”

Once again, my eyes welled up.

I leaned in and hugged Edward. He seemed shocked for a minute, stiff, but hugged me back. I pulled away and in an attempt to gain my masculinity back, I sniffed back my mucus loudly and spit in the sink after, making Edward chuckle. I rolled my eyes and made my way back into the living room with him.


Ten minutes later, everyone was walking down to the basement.
Carlisle opened the door and Bella kissed Edward softly before climbing in. I knew she couldn’t stand the fact that she wasn’t out there with him, but she wasn’t going to worry Renesmee.

I turned around and picked Nessie up. She wrapped her legs around my waist then squeezed my neck, kissing me all over my face. I caught her lips and kissed her a little bit too long for it to be considered chaste, but whatever.

After one last hug, I guided her into the room. It wasn’t half bad. It had padded floor and it wasn’t small. Esme had put some blankets and pillows in there, along with food and blood. Nessie grimaced though, and sat her stuff down. I blew her a kiss and Bella went to the control panel and closed the doors. I heard the locks click then other sounds I couldn’t place.

Then all was silent.

The rest of us stood still, looking at each other. Time to wait.


I was laying on the couch at about ten p.m. and there hadn’t been a sign of them. Emmett and Jasper walked in the room right as my eyelids started drooping.

“I caught Luca’s scent,” Jasper said, looking at me, and then at Carlisle.

I jumped up, grabbed my gun and rushed outside. I heard the others inside loading their guns.

I also had a knife laced with Wolfsbane in a strap against my ankle. If needed, I could stab one directly in the heart, causing it to die instantly.

Emmett and Jasper stood at my sides, each armed with two semis loaded with pure silver bullets. I had one already, and I had another round in my pocket.

Thank god I’d played Call of Duty so much.

We all were waiting to see if we could hear anything. Alice and rose walked out with their guns and stood behind Emmett and Jasper. I had my gun held up, ready to aim. Esme was perched at a window with a sniper.

Vampires with guns. Is it possible for something to be ludicrous and serious at the same time?

I tensed up after I heard a twig snap.

It was dark, but I could still see a pretty good bit, so I swept the yard with my eyes. I saw a flash of gray. The others saw it too and all aimed their guns in that direction. I saw a one charging me. It was running on four legs, but its back was highly arched. I aimed, and shot four shots straight at the head. It stalled and stood up on its hind legs, which looked natural for the way it was built. Emmett hit it right in the heart. It yelped, and fell backwards.

I reloaded my gun. One down, fourteen left to go, according to Edward.

“That wasn’t Luca, that was the runt of their pack. They were testing us. They have a plan, but they won’t think about it, so we have to stay focused,” Edward said, walking out with a revolver. He’s so old fashioned.
I took a deep breath, and waited again.


Within the next ten minutes, we had killed four more. Then, ten came flashing around in a disarray. Even with our senses, we were missing them, because we needed to shoot them in the heart in order to kill them.

Everyone was firing wildly, including me, until I felt a sharp pain in my shoulder. One of them was trying to pull off my shoulder. I whipped my arm around and punched it in the face. It released its grip from my shoulder then scratched my back before gnawing at my ankle.

I was screaming, I’m sure, but I wasn’t thinking at the moment. It ripped the skin off my leg and everyone was trying to fight him off of me and keep the others away from the house at the same time. I forced myself to reach at my other ankle and I pulled my knife out. I pushed him off and stabbed it in the heart.

I stabbed him all over, the pain in my leg fueling my rage.

I started shaking, and heat ran through me. I couldn’t phase though! There’d be no way for me to aim a gun with paws.

“Dammit!” I shouted, clamping my teeth together. All I saw was blood and my shoulder was throbbing. Esme had shot three other wolves. There were six others all still fighting and I was shaking and throbbing all over.

I saw something over near the house, so I tailed it, ignoring the pain in my leg and shoulder. My eyes adjusted and I saw that it was the biggest werewolf out all of them.

It must be Luca.

He ignored me and busted through one of the windows. I jumped through after him, sprinting.

He was heading for the basement.

I gripped my gun, waiting for Luca to turn around, but he wouldn’t. He ran downstairs and I stumbled down the stairs after him. He was pacing back-and-forth beside the door when I finally limped down the stairs.

“Hey, jackass. No way you’re getting in there,” I spat, aiming my gun. He snarled at me then ran towards me. I shot him straight in the heart before he got to me, but he started biting my wounded leg before he died.

I tumbled in pain, groaning. I was laying beside Luca, gripping my gun tightly. The pain in my leg was unbearable. I couldn’t see anything but blood — my muscle and bone – without a trace of skin. I shot him in anger two more times before I blacked out.


When I woke up, Nessie was stroking my hair. I was in one of the spare rooms at the Cullens’ main house. It was converted into a mini-hospital almost. I was hooked up to an IV and a heart monitor. It smelled all sterile and weird.

“You’re awake!” Ness exclaimed when she noticed me looking up at her. I blinked, and swallowed, my mouth dry. There was a glass of water on the table beside me, but my arm was bandaged enough to keep it still, so I couldn’t reach for it.

“Oh! Do you want some water?” She put the cup to my lips and gave me some water without me answering. I gulped it down, trying to ignore the tremendous pain in my shoulder from just swallowing.

“How long have I been out?” I asked, groaning a little.

Nessie stroked my hair. “About fifteen hours. Carlisle had to do surgery on you because your shoulder was partially crushed and muscles and tendons were torn. Your leg was pretty bad too, but you’re healing, and you’ll get better,” she said, her voice cracking.

“I’m sorry,” I said feebly.

Ness looked up. Her eyes were still swollen and red — her face pale and dark circles were under her eyes. “God, Jake…” – She lost her voice for a minute– “… I was so scared.”

“You didn’t see me like that, did you?” I asked, and she looked away.

“I knew you were hurt before I heard you screaming outside of the door…it’s like I could feel it too. When I heard the shots, and your screaming, I lost it. I made mom open the door and the others were already there moving you upstairs.” Tears poured down her beautiful face.

I closed my eyes. “I can’t believe I let him get that close to you,” I said, disappointed.

Ness shook her head. “No, no, no. He wouldn’t have been able to get through the door. I don’t think he realized how much Carlisle did to secure the room. The others had all been killed, and you killed Luca amazingly, even with half your muscles torn apart. I’m pretty sure he meant for the others to die. He was trying to distract them so he could slide in here. I guess he didn’t expect you to notice,” she explained.

I nodded. “Just like Victoria. Trying to distract us,” I said, and she looked down.

“Well, I’m really thankful you’re okay. You just can’t move for a couple of days. You’ll have to give your muscles time to heal. You should be healed up before too long.”

Ness smiled down at me.

I groaned. I hate being bed ridden. I can still move my right arm though, so I could document this oh-so-fun experience.

Thank God for television.

- Jacob


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