April 22, 2013
There were no words to describe what I felt as I walked into the lodge. The sight I saw was so incredibly, unbelievably, heartbreaking. There is now way I will ever talk to Sam or Emily again.
Their names echoed in my head along with the repeating image of them kissing as I turned and walked back out the door.
HOW COULD THEY? It was like a news headline being printed over and over a million times on newspapers across the world: ‘Emily and Sam kiss! Leah is left heart broken!’
It made me wonder if this had been going on for awhile or if it was something new. Why would they kiss in public—in front of me and our families—while Sam and I were still together? Or at least I thought we were. He apparently had other plans.
I drove home at a speed that would have made a race car driver anxious. I don’t remember much of the drive—or getting home, or going to my room—but the next thing I knew I was lying on my bed.
I wasn’t sure of how much time had gone by as I lay there and cried my heart out. When I heard the others arrive, I locked my door and clamped my windows shut, yanking the curtains closed with a harsh jerk that left my shoulder sore. A while later, my stinging eyes flew open to the sound of something hitting glass. The lights were still on in my room and the house was quiet so I went to my window.
It was him.
I don’t know what I had been expecting. Maybe I had forgotten for a moment. Sam was standing below it, throwing pebbles at the pane of my window. His face was pleading. I closed the curtain and turned off the lights. There was no way I was ever talking to him again.
When the waves of crying washed over me once more, I shed no tears. Instead, my cries were silent broken sobs. I would not cry for Sam. Only for what could have been.
Thanks for reading!