Renesmee’s Dairy~The Pain

December 19, 2013

Dear Diary,

My eyes were closed. I could not open them. The pain was excruciating. I don’t know how long I’ve been in this black void of anguish. I can still hear things—people talking or the TV—from time to time. This must be because of my half-vampire hearing, but I don’t think any of my family was able to hear anything until they were almost completely transformed, especially not this clearly. This is odd, and it’s horrible; almost as horrible as the pain itself. At first all I heard was muffled voices, and then I heard Jacob and my dad talking a little. They were trying to be quiet but I could still hear them.

“It’s only been four days. Amelia told us last night that the hybrids usually die on the second or third day. She’s still with us. She’s going to be fine.” Dad was reassuring Jacob unsuccessfully.

Jacob grunted in response. Then he sniffled. Another hot flash of pain went up my arm towards my heart and I couldn’t help the gut-wrenching scream that escaped my lips. Jacob was immediately by my side squeezing my hand through the worst of it, whispering words of comfort into my ear, his breathe hot against the side of my face. The pain subsided, but not nearly enough for the yelling to stop.

“Oh, my sweet Renesmee. It’s going to be fine. Shhh. Shhh. Oh, God,” Jacob mumbled, tears lacing his voice. He laid his searing forehead on my arm and hey lay there for a few minutes. The next few hours were the worst of it. Every ten minutes or so my screams would commence again and I’d writhe in agony. I was surprised that Jacob and Dad stayed through it all.

Then, something happened. All at once, blood laced with the poison of Amelia’s venom all charged towards my heart and I shrieked in absolute agony. Something was holding the venom near my heart. This was the worst pain I had felt yet. Everyone in the house knew something was very wrong and they rushed for Rose’s room where Rose and Mom had moved me when all this pain had started. From the footsteps I could discern Rosalie, Jasper, Mom, Gran, and Grandpa in the room now. Alice and Emmett must had stayed with Amelia.

“Oh my god. What’s happening? I’ve never heard that sound come from anything before. Vampire, human, or animal,” Grandpa said, horrified. He came up to the bed and laid his hand on my chest, right above my heart. 

“We have to find a way to stop this. Edward can you read her?” Jacob said, pain evident in his strangled voice. I stopped screaming, and began to whimper. Then, I fell silent. There was a pulling sensation in my chest that I couldn’t find the cause for but the pain was manageable again.

“Something’s wrong with her . . . her heart. There’s something pulling at it. This isn’t normal,” Dad explained, puzzled.

“Nothing about this was normal. Hybrids were never meant to turn into vampires! This is bullsh*t! I’m going to kill that witch!” Jacob suddenly yelled out, and I heard him charge from the room.

“No, Jacob!” Jasper and Dad yelled simultaneously. They pulled him back into the room. He struggled a bit but then he calmed and he was next to me again.

“Maybe she needs blood. I can’t remember the last time she fed,” Jacob whispered.

“We have no more elk or human blood to feed her, Jacob. And we can’t feed her human food in her state. We can’t leave, either. If the Brotherhood comes for Amelia, we have to have everyone here. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what we can do. She could die if she doesn’t feed soon,” Grandpa said, sadly. He sighed.

Jacob’s hand became stiff on my upper arm. He took a deep breath and spoke slowly and purposefully. “Give her mine,” he said, determination in his voice. Everyone gasped.

“No, Jacob. We don’t know what your blood will do to her,” Grandpa told him calmly.

“I don’t care. Give her a transfusion, try to suck the venom out or. . . or separate it from her normal blood or something! We can’t just sit here and wait for her to die! I can’t sit here and watch my imprint go through this! We have to do something. . . ” He had begun to whisper by the end. A pause. His footsteps side-swiped everyone’s before anyone could stop him and he launched himself out of the open two-story window. By the sound of clothes ripping, I’d say he had morphed. I then heard a wolf howl and my Jacob was gone.

Then, Mom spoke up. “Just leave him. He will come back; he can’t stay away from Nessie long. What’s wrong with her, Carlisle?” she whispered, and my dad moved to her side.

“I don’t know. She shouldn’t be screaming this much. Something’s wrong. Very wrong. It’s as if there is a nuclear war going on between Bella and Edward’s blood that made her and Amelia’s venom but . . . wait. Rose, didn’t Nessie used to bite Jacob when she was little?” Grandpa inquired.

“Yes, that’s how we found out she wasn’t venomous. She would have killed him if she were,” Rose said, confused.

Then, realization dawned on me just as I’m sure it dawned on Grandpa. My heart picked up its pace. I sucked in a sharp breathe.

Jacob’s blood.

That’s what was happening. I was different from the other hybrids in that I had Jacob’s blood in me from when I bit him as a child. I had vampire, human, and wolf blood inside me. And Jacob’s blood was holding back and fighting the venom just like Jacob would fight a vampire in the real world. But my body couldn’t stand much more of this and it showed no signs of stopping. I did not see any way of getting out of this.

All there was left to do was wait.


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