February 5, 2014
It’s been a little over a week since all that insanity with Alistair, Mike, Jessica, and the others. We’ve actually had some peace and quiet for a change. I’ve spent most of my time in my home office when I wasn’t working of course. When we put all of the pieces together of what had happened; basically Alistair learned of the other hybrids because he had visited the Volturi before they were destroyed. He thought of them as not natural to our kind, which is another reason he left us and didn’t stand with us when faced off against the Volturi that first time. He went to see them after Alyssa was created and promised them a place in his army as Alyssa had described but it was all a lie. He just wanted them destroyed. Thankfully he didn’t find out about Nahuel and his sisters.
Zafrina had to come clean to Nahuel and his sisters about their other siblings and what had happened to them. As you remember, she and Rogue had agreed to keep him in the dark as long as possible. At first he was rightfully upset with that notion but once he realized what a destructive mess they created, he understood that their destruction was for the better. Alistair remembered that a lot of our family had gifts but the only one he needed to use or avoid rather was Alice’s. That was the only way he could pull off his plan. And the two wives only real influence in this was that they wanted revenge on us for killing their mates. Though he thought a lot of things through, he hadn’t counted on Mike telling Jessica or her coming to us and so forth. So his plan wasn’t fool-proof and had plenty of holes. There was also the existence of the Watchers that he never counted on.
All ended in our favor at the end. Well it ended even better than we had hoped when Kim proposed to Michelle. That was quite cute and special. They both agreed that they wanted their wedding in like April or May. Alice had just started getting Leah’s wedding ready. Leah and Keith wanted to get married at the end of February; avoiding Valentine’s Day at all costs. And Leah wanted to get married in La Push. So that was what Alice was scurrying around doing. That thought made me smile as I left my home office and walked down the stairs into the living room. When I entered a very peculiar image greeted me; Keith, Jacob, Emmett, and John were watching some football game. Jasper, Peter, and Seth were talking Civil War and playing chess, while Alexander was sitting on one of the couches with his sketchbook and drawing something; I could hear Edward playing the piano softly from the other side of the living room. Jacob saw me enter:
“Welcome to the bachelor pad.” He grumbled as the others smiled.
“Where are the women?” I asked perplexed as Edward joined me.
“They’re at my and Bella’s place, in the home theater that we built for her birthday.” Edward explained.
“So…..” I asked not understanding what was going on as Alexander picked up the explanation.
“We’re not allowed. Women Only.”
“I’m not allowed in my own house, Nessie even put a sign on the front door saying ‘NO MEN ALLOWED’.” Edward said shaking his head.
“You’re so whipped.” Jacob said looking at Edward with a smirk. A pillow came flying and hit Jacob in the head; Alexander threw it at him from the couch. Everyone chuckled a little.
“What are they doing?” I asked.
“Talking about the Grammy’s; everything from performances to fashion. Basically, chick talk.” Emmett supplied.
“Are you trying to tell me Leah, Bella, Kim, and Rogue are talking fashion?” I looked a little shocked as everyone including Jasper laughed at my expression.
“You got it. And we’re not allowed to see them until they’re done.” Jasper answered.
“Wow.” I said.
“That was my exact reaction when I heard as well.” Alexander sighed.
“Well can’t you open a portal or something and see what they’re doing?” Seth asked as Alexander, Keith, and John shook their heads.
“No. That would be spying and we were asked to leave them alone. What’s the harm in that? As long as they’re having fun, some girl time will do them all good.” John said wisely. The rest of us nodded. He was right. Just then Peter and Jasper got up.
“We need to hunt.” I looked at them and said:
“I’ll join you, wouldn’t hurt to get a bear or some deer in me.” They nodded and we all waved to the rest as we ran out the back door and into the woods.
Meanwhile at Edward and Bella’s place, the ladies were all downstairs in the home theater. They were dressed in sweats and pajamas. For once Alice didn’t grumble about anyone’s clothes. It was a lazy comfortable day where people could just snuggle under quilts and talk about girly things. Besides both Bella and Nessie were wearing matching pajamas which were red and plaid and 100% cotton. They looked like twins and very cute. Rosalie had seen them while out shopping one day and got them for the other two. Because we had that battle and stuff to deal with last week and weekend, we DVR’d the Grammy’s and were able to watch them properly afterwards. Even some of the men watched. But when it came to the surgical dissection of each performance and each outfit, men were certainly at a disadvantage there.
Leah and Kim were a little hesitant to come as they were very anti girly but Bella convinced Leah and Rose convinced Kim plus they said that Rogue had spent the whole night on Facebook putting up commentary statuses regarding the Grammy’s and they were hysterical. So the first thing the ladies did before talking fashion is let Rogue read her list of comments regarding the overall Grammy’s that Amy had actually printed out. Here’s what she had written (you needed to have watched the Grammy’s to understand this):
v Ok um WTF was up with that chick (Lorde) singing Royals? She looked like she was zapped in from the 1980s and what was up with her nails? First weirdo of the night…..Beyoncé and Jay Z rocked it though! Super sexy!
v Who is Hunter Hayes? But the song is definitely for everyone…..who is trying to live differently. It gave me chills.
v How the hell can Daft Punk see where the fuck they’re going in those things? Pharrell said thank you on behalf of the robots……peachy.
v Very Halloween Katy Perry’s performance….obviously I love it! Duh!
v Chicago and Robin Thicke is a lot better than him and Miley Cyrus that’s for sure! This is so classy and wonderful.
v Keith Urban is hot as hell! Didn’t catch the dude’s name that is singing with him but another awesome duet. When you leave all the douchebags at home (Miley, Kanye, Bieber), you will have a fabulous show! Love love love guitar solos!
v John Legend….is phenomenal. You don’t need a shit load of instruments….one piano is enough to make something vibrate in your soul.
v Wow….big guy and tiny guy….he needs some stilts. Plus a 7ft tall dude that looks like a sheriff from the Wild West.
v Taylor Swift is gorgeous and so very talented. She can play guitar and piano….I love her so much. I don’t care if her every song is about breakups…..she’s doing it for all of us.
v Pink doing her Cirque du Soleil routine….singing and doing that is beyond amazing! She’s a super star! Holy crap! How she can spin that fast and sing and not be out of breath is beyond me!
v Ariana Grande looks like a Rorschach Blat or however you spell that. That dress belongs on a 14 year old; even Joan Rivers said that!
v Ok can Lorde be anymore awkward? She’s obviously very Goth but like dude….pull yourself together; straighten your shoulders….you’re not 60!
v OMG Ringo Star! This is the performance people have been waiting for all eve! Just waiting on his duet w/Paul. That would complete everything!
Meanwhile, could anyone understand wtf Ozzy said? Translation? Ancient Greek is less confusing!
v Magic Dragon…..and Kendrick Lamar….very unlikely duet. Ok I’m not a rap fan so that’s totally not my thing. Taylor was the only one with her friend dancing. Magic Dragon’s song is awesome. Could anyone understand a word of Lamar’s song? It sounded like a bunch of loud noise; my brain hurt.
v Kacy who? The neon cacti after all that insanity…..hmmm. Do their clothes REALLY have Christmas lights on them? The lyrics at least are kind of funny.
v Metallica with whom? Can’t they just sing alone? And wth is with that commercial? It looked like a really bad half time super bowl thing on a really bad LSD trip!
v Long Long? Did I hear that correctly? Is he a sausage?
v IT’S HAPPENING! PAUL AND RINGO!!!! YAY!!! (Ok yes I know a bit too excited there)
v What is up with Pharell’s hat? “Only you can prevent forest fires!” Smokey called, he wants his hat back…..like yesterday!
v Country legends…..wow….Willie Nelson and Kris Kristofferson….will be joined by Blake Shelton and Merle Haggard…. just amazing.
v Pharell, Daft Punk, and the amazing Stevie Wonder! Btw does anyone actually know what Daft Punk look like under the robot gear? (looked it up and they look like the kids next door)
v It’s the piano Grammy’s…..Carol King and Sara Barellias……two tremendous voices.
Cyndi Lauper’s hair is like stop sign red…..too much. Sunglasses needed, stat!
v Ella is her name (Lorde chick)…..and she is wearing a giant black condom and I think that either Katy Perry or Macklemore should have won. Bleh.
v Sausage guy….Long Long and the legendary Metallica! This was amazing; he’s a maestro on the piano.
v Oh dear lord….here we go…..Steven Tyler and Smokey Robinson….please don’t give this to Lorde! Nope, Daft Punk got it! Do they even speak?
v One of the best songs of the year….Same Love by Macklemore and Ryan Lewis. The vow exchanging of the 34 couples was amazing! Gave me chills. Queen Latifah did a great job though I think having Madonna there for 3 seconds to sing 6 words was overkill.
v The Educator Award that was added is a very smart thing to do and glad a very awesome teacher received it!
v Miranda Lambert and Billy Armstrong…..is that dude from White Stripes or whatever they’re called?
v Robots aka Daft Punk wins album of the year and again Smokey the bear aka Pharrell has to speak for them!
v Nine Inch Nails and a whole bunch of people whose names slip my mind…..but all very rocking performers in their own right! Fleetwood Mac and the dude from Nirvana now part of the Foo Fighters on drums and someone else.
v These were awesome Grammy’s! Dominated by pianos and guitars. Great performances by all! Congrats to all winners and nominees!
Mind you during each comment, Amy would man the screen and bring up the image of what Rogue was describing on the screen for added effect. By the time Rogue had finished, people were in stitches. Alice had laughed so hard she had rolled right off her chair and onto the floor which made everyone laugh even harder; Nessie snorted at least twice. Leah was wiping tears away from laughing as were Kim and Michelle. Rogue was right on the money with her commentary. Everyone who initially had issues with coming to this girl’s night in were definitely glad they had come. Rose meanwhile opened two bottles of wine and made a bunch of popcorn for the event.
Everyone agreed that Best Dressed was between Katy Perry and Taylor Swift. Worst Dressed was Lorde hands down and Pharrell’s hat. Best Dressed men were Robin Thicke, Macklemore & Ryan Lewis. Rogue said Robin Thicke’s wife looked like she was wearing a plastic shower curtain with lions on it. Beyonce’s dress was just too lacy-patchy according to Amy and Corin. Madonna’s suit with cane was out of place according to Kim who said it belonged center stage at the Barnum & Bailey’s circus tent. The women were definitely being critical. Julia Roberts looked stunning in her dress and Esme and Maria said they wished their legs could go on for miles like that.
Least favorite performance was that of Magic Dragons and Lamar Kendrick for everyone, followed by in close second by Lorde. Best performance was impossible to pick; everyone agreed that Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr together and Ringo Starr alone were phenomenal. That was just legendary as well as the country quad with Willie Nelson. Katy Perry’s was amazing as it really took Goth to a whole new level. The most creative was definitely given to Pink and her Cirque du Soleil show. That couldn’t be outdone by anyone. Strangest was the cactus lady, Kacy Musgraves with the Christmas lights that no one could figure out.
Alice made it real for everyone by creating actual scoring cards so they could eventually choose who the winners of each category was. It was really cool and funny to see people debating back and forth about who was great and who just plain sucked. It was almost midnight when they decided to end their fun evening. Esme had prepared dinner for the men in the main house and for the women at Bella’s. So everyone was fed, happy, and tired from their day. Nessie took the ‘NO MEN ALLOWED’ sign off the door and Rogue let Alexander know telepathically that they were done which he conveyed to the rest of us; Jasper, Peter, and I had long returned from hunting, fed, and happy. We were all enjoying a glass of wine in the living room when the signal was given at midnight that the women were done. We decided that the next time the women would a girl’s night out or in, we men would plan something ahead of time so we wouldn’t be all discombulated like we were today.
We all had decided to go meet the women at Bella and Edward’s house. When we got there, they were all slowly filtering out of the house, still laughing and talking excitedly about the day and evening they spent together. Everyone looked happy but tired. It was time to sleep. We were all standing on the front lawn when suddenly we felt the earth move under our feet. It wasn’t a strong motion but enough to be noticed as something out of the ordinary.
“Was that an earthquake?” Jacob asked when the movement stopped. Everyone looked at Rogue.
“Don’t look at me, I didn’t do it.” She said as she knelt to touch the ground.
“That was weird.” Nessie said frowning.
“It wasn’t of supernatural origin. So it was definitely an earthquake.” Rogue said getting back up from her hunches after touching the ground.
“Do we even have fault lines under NH?” I asked puzzled; I knew it wasn’t a seismically active region but who knows.
“Well if you recall a few years back while we were still in Forks, there was a sizable earthquake in Virginia that was felt as far north as Connecticut. So this could be from somewhere else but we are feeling it up here.” Jasper said philosophically. We all nodded.
“I’ll have to look it up.” Rogue said her eyes lightening up. We had forgotten she was our natural disasters expert.
“I’ll help you.” Esme volunteered smiling. She had gotten into that stuff too after she and Rogue had that long conversation regarding the matter during our vacation on Rogue’s Isle.
“Alright everyone, time to get some rest.” I said and we all hugged and kissed each other goodnight and started walking back to our respective homes.
“Talk about ending the day with some shake, rattle, and roll.” Jacob said sarcastically as he walked to his cabin with the wolves and everyone chuckled as we walked along and looked at the cloudless, moonless sky.
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