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May

31st

Making Peace

Dear Diary,

Bells really did come through for me. Well, as much as she could, anyway. Bella is very stubborn, but I’ve recently learned that so is Edward; on the subject of his daughter. Not that I wouldn’t be.

I slept easily that night, knowing that everything was almost at peace. Besides Edward hating the fact I imprinted on his daughter, that is. I mean, he can read my damn mind, can he not see that I love her? Or the fact that I would never hurt her. I know it sounds corny, but she completes me. I know that sounds like it would come off of a Hallmark card, but really. That’s pretty much the definition of the word imprint for us. Our soul mate. Nessie happens to be mine, and I want Edward to open his freaking eyes and see that.

When I went to the Cullens’ house today, I didn’t run into any of them, but I found Bella outside. She was playing around with this thing that you download books onto. She’s such a geek.

“Hey, Bells.” I said, easily taking a seat on one of their patio chairs.

“Hello, Jake. How are you? Did you heal up okay?” She asked, her brow slightly furrowing. I nodded.

“Yeah, it’s all better. How’s…Edward?” I whispered his name, wondering where he was. I wasn’t scared of him, but I wanted to ask Bella what happened after he left, without him overhearing. She rolled her eyes.

“He’s teaching Renesmee some song on the piano.” She told me. I breathed a quiet sigh.

“What’d he say?” I asked cautiously. She sighed.

“Well, of course he’s not happy about it, Jake.” She said.

“Duh, Bella. But…is he…okay with it?” I questioned. She thought for a moment, before nodding slowly.

“Yes, I guess you can say that. He doesn’t hate you right now. It’s been reduced to highly disliking you.” She stated.

“Like that’s new.” I muttered. She looked at me with sympathy.

“He’s going to let you have a relationship with her, but he needs time to adjust. I would advise to take it slow with her.” I sighed.

“Bells, you really think I wouldn’t? She’s practically only fifteen. I mean, really?” I asked, appalled.

“Don’t get mad. I know you wouldn’t do that. I was just saying.” She shrugged. I grimaced, and leaned back in the chair.

“Jake!” I heard a squeal, that sounded like a peal of bells. I glanced up, and saw Ness tackle me. I laughed, and wrapped my arms lightly around her for a second, and watched Edward walk outside stiffly, nodding in my direction. I nodded back, and he sat beside Bella; glaring at the ground. I let Ness move to a chair beside me, trying to make it more comfortable for Edward.

Edward, you know by now how much she means to me. I thought. Well, I screamed mentally. Edward winced, but then nodded.

Then why are you acting so upset? I thought, not so loudly. He shrugged.

“She’s almost everything to me.” I heard a soft whisper leave his mouth. I frowned, and willed him with my mind to look up.

“You don’t think I know this?” I asked him. He shrugged, and Bella got up, grabbing Nessie’s hand.

“Come on sweetheart, let’s go.” Bella said. Ness tried to protest, but Bella gave her stern a look. Ness stomped after Bella inside, and I turned my attention to Edward.

“Edward, I know you can read my thoughts, but I don’t think you get it. Nessie is my imprint. That means no matter what, I want her happy, healthy, and loved. I would do anything in my power to keep her safe, and protect her. She is the center of my universe, the only thing that truly matters to me. I love her with all of my being, and I would die for her. She is my one true love, or I guess you could say soul mate.” I said, without tripping over one word. Edward stared at me unwavering, and I stared back.

“I know, Jacob. But she is my little girl.” He whispered. I cleared my throat.

“I might not have kids, but I see that it is hard to let your child grow up. I know this is hard for you, but it had to happen sooner or later. Besides, she’s not completely grow up. She’s still your little girl, and I am positive she always will be.” I said, my voice clear, and strong. Edward sighed, and laid his head in his hands.

“It’s too hard for me too let go.” He murmured.

“Edward, I’m not asking for you to let go. You never have to let go. Just…loosen your hold a bit, and let her have room to grow.” I said. Edward looked at me through bleary eyes.

“You’re really thinking philosophically today, aren’t you?” he asked. I thought for a moment.

“No, I’m just saying what needs to be said.” I told him. Edward nodded.

“I never have actually hated you…I just hated the situations at the time. You’re actually a nice acquaintance.” He said. I rolled my eyes.

“Just say the word friend. And…ditto.” I answered. Edward chuckled, and it sounded slightly…relieved?

“Yes, Jacob. I feel relieved. I am relieved to have everything put behind us.” He said. I smiled.

“I’m glad too, Eddie.” I replied. He mock-glared at me.

“As long as you don’t call me ‘Eddie’.” He said, using finger quotations around the nickname. I laughed, and breathed deeply.

“Go on, Jacob. I know you’ve wanted to see her.” Edward said, gesturing to the door. I grinned, and made my way inside the house, and into the kitchen. It was vacant, which didn’t surprise me. With the only person who ate was Ness, it was rarely used. Esme knew better than to leave the fridge empty, though, and kept it fully stocked for my use. Esme rocked when it comes to food.

I grabbed a Coke, and some chips, and walked into the living room. Ness was in there with Bella, and they were watching some chick flick on the monstrous television that took up almost the whole wall. I sat at the end of the couch, and crunched on some chips, and gulped down some soda. Bella laughed at me, and excused her self, after giving me a knowing, but stern look. I rolled my eyes at her, and as soon as she left the room, Ness flashed over to my side, and cuddled into me.

“Mmm, I missed you.” She sighed. I smiled, my heart melting more and more as the seconds went by.

“I missed you too.” I whispered into her hair, smelling her pomegranate fragrance that I knew so well.

“Is my dad okay with…us?” She whispered. I grinned.

“He actually is.” I said. She turned to look at me, and smiled widely, her eyes sparkling. I lightly traced her jaw, and she leaned into me, softly touching my lips. This kiss was less rough, and erratic than our first. It was slow, and passionate, and I was glad that I was the one kissing her, instead of that tool. My skin tingled from wherever she touched, and I felt like I was slowly, melting into the sofa.

How in the hell did she get so good at kissing?

Pulling back for air, she gave me a wistful look, and kissed my nose.

“I love you.” She said breathlessly.

“I love you too, Renesmee.” She blushed, and I felt my heart skip a beat.

She caressed my cheek, and slowly turned around, so that she sat comfortably leaning against me.

Even now, writing this, my cheek is tingling from her touch, and my heart aches from being apart for the night.

That’s all for now. I’ll talk to you later,

-Jacob

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May

23rd

Edward’s Reaction

Dear Diary,

Well, I guess I can say Edward didn’t take it the best. I mean, he didn’t take it the worst either, thankfully.

He might’ve given me a black eye, and a couple of broken ribs, before Bells made him stop. The last time I saw that glint in his eye, it was an hour or so after I kissed Bella for the first time; around the time before we fought all of those newborns.

When he came to my house yesterday, he knocked lightly on the door instead of breaking it down, so I wasn’t too terrified of answering, expecting him to take it calmly, and maturely like you would expect a hundred year old mind reading vampire would. That is until he starting beating the living hell out of me. Thankfully, Bella, my savior, came shortly after, pulling him off of me.

“Stop!” She shrieked, her inhuman voice rising two octaves, and sounding like music. I easily got up, and wiped the blood from my mouth. She then started reprimanding him like a two year old, telling him violence wasn’t the answer. I also can recall the growl that rumbled from him after I thought that. So, I backed away a few steps.

“You will never kiss my daughter again!” He spat through his teeth, ignoring Bella’s intimidating glare.

“She’s my imprint! What else can I do?” I yelled back. Bella was practically the one between us, stopping the fight from progressing.

I couldn’t decide whether to laugh at, or loathe the leech keeping me from my girl. Why must things always suck for me?

I was shaking, but I kept it under control, ‘cause I didn’t need the pack coming over here and starting a commotion once I phased, letting them know I was getting beat up by a leech. I had already felt myself healing after a few seconds, and Edward wasn’t struggling to much to get out of Bella’s grip.

“Why did you tell her, you idiot?” Edward asked, venom lacing his voice, but it was calmer than before.

“I couldn’t just let her go off with another guy, Ed. She’s my imprint. It had to happen sooner or later, anyway.” I said, trying to make my voice seem even. Edward rolled his eyes.

“I know that she is your imprint” –as he gestured to his head– “but couldn’t you wait longer, until she was more mature, emotionally, and mature enough to be kissed?” Edward said, his voice still full of malice. I looked at him in disbelief.

“Says the guy who let her go on a date with a punk, who most likely has only one thing on his filthy mind!” I shot back. Edward glared.

“It is my responsibility to raise my daughter the right way, which means a normal life. If you live a normal life, you date. Simple as that.” I groaned.

“How can somebody live a normal life, in a house full of vampires? Especially vampires that sparkle!” I shouted. Edward rolled his eyes.

“My daughter, my decisions. I decide what’s best for her.” He stated patiently. I wasn’t so patient.

“Well, sorry Eddie. It’s too late for that now.” I said grinning. Edward growled, and crouched like a freaking lion. I tensed, but Bella slapped him on the back of the head.

“Oh, stop Edward. What’s done is done.” Edward mumbled something too low for even my superhuman hearing to hear, but I’m pretty sure it was him apologizing to Bella. She rolled her eyes when he glared at me again.

“We’ll discuss this more tomorrow.” He said, and stalked out of my house. Bella sighed deeply, and shook her head. After staring at the door for a couple more seconds, she turned to me, giving me an apologetic look before examining my wounds lightly.

“I’m glad you told her, truthfully. She’s felt…attracted to you lately, and she didn’t like it. She thought you would blow her off, considering her age. She didn’t understand the feelings she had for you, and it was so hard for me not to tell her. She has felt really insecure these past few months.” She whispered. I nodded.

“I’m glad too. I’m surprised how well Edward took it. I thought he would kill me for sure.” I laughed. Bella grimaced.

“I’m sorry I got here late…I didn’t even know he left the house until a minute after he did, and then I had to follow his scent here, and…” she trailed off, rolling her eyes. I nodded.

“It’s fine. I just…I want him to be okay with this…I really want to be accepted. I remember, that a few months after I imprinted on her, you finally accepted it…and I knew Edward sort of accepted it, but he’s being all protective dad now, probably not wanting his little girl to grow up, and all. I…I just want to be with her as comfortably as possible, with everyone accepting it.” I said, and looked at Bella. She was nodding.

“I understand, Jake, I do. I remember how bad I wanted you to accept my relationship with Edward…you were stubborn about that of course. I’ll talk to him, and he’ll come around. You don’t know how proud I am of you, and how amazing it is to know my best friend will always be in my life, even if it is as my son-in-law. Therefore, I will do everything in my power to help you with your relationship with my daughter.” She said, her voice sweet and soft. This is why Bella is my best friend. I grinned.

“Bells, you’re sounding all old on me now.” I teased lightly. She slapped my arm, laughing slightly, before wrapping her arms around me softly. I patted her head, and we both said goodbye. She left quietly, and I remember the relief I felt. I was completely healed now, and there was only a slight shadow under my eye, so all I felt was the high from telling Ness, and her returning those feelings.

My stomach felt like mushy Angel Soft toilet paper by the time I realized that I am practically in a relationship with Nessie now. I was finally with her. When I started thinking about it, I felt a scarcely familiar feeling boil up in me. Nervousness.

This feeling is definitely new, considering the only girl I had ever felt a fraction of this for was Bella, and I never had felt too nervous around her. With Ness, I felt comfortable, but I was nervous now, because I didn’t want to mess up. I want to be perfect, the man she deserves. It’s easy to see she’s way out of my league, and I want to make sure I am the best I can possibly be for her.

While I thought through everything thing that happened tonight, my outdated phone rang my text message alert.

J, I forgot to tell you something… I love you, too.

My heart had hammered in my chest, and I blew my hair out of my eyes, and sighed.

She loves me.

I really hope that Bella gets Edward to chill out, and maybe I’ll be able to have an open relationship with Ness.

I’ll talk to you later, hopefully this all works out.


- Jacob


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April

26th

A New Scent

Dear Diary,

Nessie’s party went fantastic. Alice really went all out for it. It was awesome. I normally don’t go to big parties like that, but it was great to see the way Nessie’s face lit up, and stayed that way until everyone left. I gave her the necklace with the wooden wolf on it, and still remembered the look on her face.

It was different from Bella’s, and it was bigger than hers, too. She loved it. It was great to see the grimace on Edward’s face when she tackled me.

Ah, good times.

When the party ended, the pack and I said our goodbyes, our patrol starting in an hour or so. I grudgingly left, blowing Nessie a kiss on my way out, and ran with the guys into the woods.

I stripped down like always, and instantly felt the heat shiver through me, and my body heavily shook, and soon landed on all fours.

The pack and I ran in comfortable silence, our minds clear of thoughts, besides the occasional thought of our imprints. We split up after about an hour, and ran our part of the border.

Dude, I just smelled a leech. I heard Embry’s voice, and we all reported to where he caught the scent.

It was an unknown scent, making it a possibility it wasn’t a ‘vegetarian’. Sam gave Paul and Jared orders to continue patrolling with Collin and Brady, while we would follow the bloodsucker’s scent. It was a long trail, that took a ton of turns, and annoyed the hell out of me.

Hey man, where the hell is this guy going? I asked, though Sam didn’t answer.

When we were about to take a turn left, and the scent ended right there. Confused, we sniffed around for another fifteen minutes, but somehow it just stopped right there. We would’ve spent longer, but patrol time was already over, and I was hungry. Sam told us we would patrol in the same place tonight, so I went back to where I shed my clothes, and phased back.

When I opened the front door of the Cullen’s house, it was quiet, little activity going on. Edward was on the couch with Nessie and Bella, the rest of the Cullens were somewhere else I guess. As soon as Nessie saw me, she jumped off the couch, and hugged me tightly. I wrapped my arms around her, noticing her figure, and heard a quiet growl.

Get outta my head you old fart! I told him in my head. He rolled his eyes.

Thankfully, Nessie had a piano lesson with Edward, so they left the room. I love spending time with Nessie, don’t get me wrong, but it’s hard to restrain myself at times. I heard another quiet growl, and stifled a laugh. Nessie once had shown me, telepathically, that she thought I was attractive. Of course, she was emotionally and physically nine years old. Of course I hope she chooses me once she matures, but who knows? Maybe some dipstick will make her fall for him. I mean, she is beautiful, smart, and funny. What guy wouldn’t want her?

I wish that I could be the protective guy, who won’t let her talk to anything close to the male species, but I don’t want to interfere. I love her too much, I only want her to be happy. And, if she’d be happy with some wimpy little turd, then I guess I’d have to deal with it.

There’s always the hope that she’ll choose me, but that could be my selfish side showing. By the time she’s matured, who knows who will try to charm her. The only thing I can do in a situation like this is to love her as much as I can, and hope she returns it. Imprints normally love the other immediately. Although, since when has anything gone normal for me? I just know that it’s only going to get more difficult from here.

Well, I guess I should stop here. Patrol is in five minutes, and I wanna say bye to Ness. I’ll tell you guys if we come across the bloodsucker tonight.

-Jacob


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April

25th

Welcome The Writer of Jacob’s Diary, Meagan!

Hey everyone! We’d like for you to give a big welcome to the writer of our newly added side project: ‘Jacob’s Diary.’ Her name is Meagan & you can read the first entry she did (it’s a short and sweet introduction entry) by clicking the “Read First Entry” button (above). I think she captures Jacob very well. She has a good grasp on Jake’s personality and I can’t wait to see her future entries!

Get to know Meagan by following her on Twitter HERE! Or, if you don’t have Twitter, shoot her an email at: JacobsDiary@bellasdiary.com to welcome her, give her feedback etc!

Please Note: Jacob’s Diary is a completely different project from Bella’s Diary, so we wont be writing based off each others stories. EX: Meagan might be writing about Jake’s life a few years from now, whilst I’m writing Bella’s Diary based on our time. Meagan might have Jacob & Nessie get engaged, fall in or out of love, meet new people, while Bella’s Diary will have something completely different happening. This is just to clear up any confusion in case you’re wondering why they don’t go together.

We hope you’re happy about having another side of the story after Breaking Dawn & that you’re excited to be able to snoop in Jacob’s Diary now, too!

Welcome Meagan!


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