Dear Diary (A Familiar Face)

Seth didn’t stay long. In fact, none of us did. We’re all in Forks right now—except for Carlisle, Esme, and Renesmee. They’re still in New Hampshire. We’ve been here for a while. I was more than excited about Seth’s visit. We all were, but we weren’t overly-enthused about the news he brought with him.

Seth can’t fake that huge, happy grin. I knew almost immediately that he was hiding something. He was worried. His eyes gave it away. They were obscure and overshadowed the innocent smile he was trying to fake. I saw the same dark concern clouding Jake’s eyes, too. His usual sunny face was becoming more of a dark, ebony sky. I was worried, but didn’t want to cross-examine them as soon as they arrived.

I waited for Edward to come home. I figured he would just listen in on Seth and Jacob’s thoughts and tell me what was bothering them if they didn’t speak up themselves. Edward and Jasper returned from hunting about twenty minutes after Seth and Jacob got to New Hampshire, to our over-sized house, fit for a family of thirty. Edward and Jasper were testing out a brand new hunting spot they found, about a twenty minute run north of our usual spot. Apparently it’s more discrete: no trails, and has an ample supply of deer.

Immediately after welcoming Jacob and Seth, Edward’s eyes grew cold, his eyebrows knitting together. I was anticipating this. For once, I was one step ahead of Edward. Now, I just had to wait. Being immortal doesn’t mean I don’t ever get impatient. Believe me, I do. The twenty minutes I had been waiting for Edward seemed . . . well, longer than twenty minutes. I get anxious when I’m worried, uncertain.

“I can’t stay long, unfortunately. I have to get back to La Push. There is something I need to tell all of you, though.” Seth’s eyes lingered on me longer than anyone else. He took in a full breath before continuing. “After you all left Forks, we stopped transforming pretty much right away. Recently, however, we’ve gotten ourselves a little visitor. We haven’t seen the vampire yet, but we’ve caught their scent and have been shape-shifting again. There have been three reported deaths due to ‘animal attacks’ in the past week.” His tone edged towards anger.

‘Animal attacks.’ Those two words brought back vague, yet haunting memories from my human life. When I was like all the others, believing that there really were vicious animals in Forks. That it was animals who killed Charlie’s friend, Waylon Forge. Whoever it is doesn’t seem concerned about the Volturi. If anyone else is killed, the town will become increasingly suspicious of these so-called animal attacks.

Jake kept his eyes fixated on Renesmee. He didn’t want to be apart from her, that much I knew. I didn’t know that he had something to tell me, though—until Edward gave it away. “Jake, are you going to tell her, or should I?” Edward spoke grimly.

“I’d prefer if you told her. I’m not good at this kind of thing. You have more experience than I do.” Jacob’s expression was submissive.

My eyes flickered nervously between Edward and Jacob, my patience tapering off with each passing second. “Will someone just tell me. I can handle it. Whatever it is couldn’t surprise me anymore than everything else I’ve witnessed in my short lifetime.” My lips involuntarily pulled down into a frown as I anticipated the worst.

“Mike Newton was one of the humans who was attacked in Forks, Bella. I’m sorry. I know he was a friend of yours since you moved to Forks. He was home for the Christmas holidays and picked up a few shifts at his family’s store.” Edward lowered his voice with each sentence. “He was closing the store alone, and—”

“He never made it back home.” I finished Edward’s sentence. It took me a few minutes to take everything in. My mind flickered to the memories I still had of Mike, tucked away in the back of my head. His smile. His innocent baby face. His many attempts to get me to date him. I thought about Jessica, too. This won’t be easy for her. Me, well . . . I’m going to have to get used to this type of thing now. This is the life I’ve chosen.

Now that I am different, cold, immortal, death will have to become something routine for me. Something I will deal with constantly. I knew that before I was turned. It’s not like I woke up one day and thought I think I’ll get Edward to turn me into a vampire for the fun of it. I knew the reality of it. The bad parts, and the good. I didn’t react to what Edward just told me, and I could see the confusion dominating everyone’s expressions. The truth is, I didn’t know exactly how to outlet my feelings. As a human, you just cry. It’s easy. Now, I just feel angry when I’m upset. Confused.

“Well, we aren’t going to let you go back alone. If there is a vampire in Forks, I think Charlie and I would be of use. We’re both still very strong. I want to help.” I bit my lower lip, catching Nessie’s worried expression out of the corner of my eye. She just heard Edward say that Mike was killed by this vampire, and here I was offering myself up on a silver platter. I don’t even know what we are facing. It could be an army of vampires. Newborns. Strong, vicious newborns. I reconsidered. Not out of fear for myself, but for Renesmee. If Jacob is gone to La Push, it’s just not fair for me to leave too.

Turns out, I didn’t have a choice. I had to go. Jacob had more to tell me, but he couldn’t say it in front of Nessie. He casually asked me to follow him up the winding staircase, keeping a fake smile plastered on his face so Renesmee wouldn’t sense anything. Edward followed, his porcelain hand brushing the small of my back as we quickly ran up the stairs. Edward already knew what Jacob was going to tell me, of course.

Without wasting even a second, Jake closed the door to Carlisle’s office and began. “This vampire is after you for some reason, Bella. We’re almost certain there’s only one. We found footsteps in the snow all around your cabin in Forks. The window was left open, too. They’ve been inside. At this point, we believe the only way to lure whoever it is out of hiding, is if you were in Forks.” Jake’s voice was filled with certainty.

I wasn’t afraid. I had no choice. If whoever was after me came at me blindsided I would stand less of a chance, so I might as well face this head on, and destroy them. I couldn’t figure out why someone would be out to get me, though. I hadn’t broken any rules—well, nothing I haven’t already suffered for. Edward was just as confused as me, and he refused to let me go back to Forks without him.

“Esme, Rosalie, Carlisle . . . I’m sure someone can stay back and watch Renesmee. She is safe here in New Hampshire. I can’t let you go alone, Bella. I won’t. I’ll be able to read their mind and we’ll be at a great advantage. Alice needs to come, too. She can help us figure out what path the attacker is on.” Edward was already half way back down the stairs before he finished his sentence. He was right, he needed to be there. We needed to be able to read the attackers mind and figure out what they were really after, and why.

Carlisle and Esme stayed back in New Hampshire with Renesmee. I hated leaving her, but I couldn’t let whoever was after me trace my scent to New Hampshire, putting Nessie in direct danger. I had to go to them.

As soon as we got back to Forks, Edward, Charlie and I went directly to our cabin, while Seth and Jacob headed back to La Push to check in with Leah to see if she had seen anything new. Rosalie, Emmett, Alice & Jasper went back to the big white Cullen house to see if anyone had been there.

Jake was right. The attacker was after me. The clothes that were left  in my closet were now flung all over the floor, while Edward’s remained perfectly untouched. I dragged in a deep breath—a habit from my time as a human. I knew this vampire wasn’t afraid. I couldn’t perfectly decipher my emotions, but I knew I wasn’t afraid, either. More anxious. Curious, maybe. But I’m a predator now. I no longer feel fear the same way I used to.

I heard the crackle of sticks outside of the cabin and figured Jake, Paul, and Leah were coming by to make sure everything was okay. Edward crouched low, as if he were ready to spring, and his upper lip pulled over his teeth as he let out a loud growl. Instinctively, I went into the same position. I could see that there was no time for Edward to elaborate on what he had heard, and I sprung through the door after him, Charlie following right after me.

She stood there, cat-like, with her brilliant red hair blowing in the cold winter wind. Her teeth were exposed and she was in a crouch. She was barefoot. My eyes darted down at her shirt. It was my shirt. She was wearing my clothing and this angered me even more. Her eyes were bright red and I couldn’t help but think of the life draining from Mike’s innocent face between her deadly grip. I let out a loud growl that echoed through the forest. I could hear the wolves running, their paws racing toward us.

It wasn’t her, though . . . that I knew.




Dear Diary (Elizabeth Masen)

“You must do everything in your power. What others cannot do, that is what you must do for my Edward.” -Elizabeth Masen

Edward pulled two tickets out of his coat pocket with an unusually questionable grin on his face. I hadn’t seen this expression before. His eyes were bigger than normal, and black. I could see that he needed to hunt. His head tilted slightly downwards, and while one side of his lips curled up, the other side seemed to curl down. Edward looked as though he didn’t know if he wanted to smile, or frown.

“Are those plane tickets?” It sounded more eager out loud than it did in my head.

Edward shifted his dark gaze down at the two tickets he held between his long, porcelain-like fingers, his body stiff, statuesque. His smooth lips looked flat now, and his eyebrows knitted together like they always do when he’s thinking of the right thing to say.

“Yes. One is for you, of course, Bella.” He reached his hand out and handed me one of the tickets, watching me intently. “I would like for you to take a trip to Chicago with me, if that’s okay.”

Edward reminded me of a boy asking a girl to be his date for a school dance. I thought about it for half a second—not because I didn’t want to go, but because I was waiting for the catch. I could tell by Edward’s expression that there was more than just taking a trip to Chicago involved.

“Well, you already got the plane tickets . . .” I bit my lower lip, stalling, in hopes that he would interrupt and give me a little more information. He didn’t. Instead he grinned, a more familiar looking grin this time, then placed his ticket back in his pocket and mumbled a quick, “Great. We leave soon.”

Our flight was in almost exactly three hours, and although Edward didn’t give me many details, he did let me know that I wouldn’t need to pack anything. It was Christmas Eve, and we would be back by early Christmas morning to celebrate with Renesmee and the rest of our family. The Denali’s were expected to come by during the evening on Christmas, too.

I went hunting with Edward before we left. My eyes were starting to darken, like Edward’s, and my throat was turning into a dry, blistering, fire every time I caught even the slightest scent of  warm, sweet-smelling human blood. We were going to be on an airplane, too, and that is the last place thirsty vampires want to be.  Accidents do happen.

The flight was short, just over an hour and a half, but seemed much quicker than that. Edward and I got caught up in a debate about Romeo and Juliet. He gets short with me when I compare our relationship to Romeo and Juliet. He doesn’t like being compared to “fickle” Romeo. I get that. But our relationship as a whole does have a few similarities.

Romeo attends the ball at the Capulet house in hopes of meeting Rosaline, but meets and falls in love with Juliet. Edward was supposed to be with Rosalie—and that didn’t work out, for obvious reasons. He then eventually met and fell in love with me.

During the “balcony scene” Romeo sneaks into the Capulet courtyard and overhears Juliet vowing her love to him, despite the fact that their families are feuding. Edward used to surreptitiously watch me sleep–and overheard me say his name as I dreamt of him.

Paris is like my Jacob; he tried to woo and attract Juliet—similar to how Jacob tried to attract me. Of course, I picked Edward, despite our differences and the fact that our love was almost forbidden . . . dangerous.

I couldn’t leave out how Romeo thought Juliet was dead, and killed himself—just like Edward was about to have himself killed when he thought that “arranging a funeral” meant my funeral. He thought I was dead and was about to have himself destroyed.

I could have debated for hours with Edward, but he’s stubborn, and unwilling to be compared to Romeo, who he believes thoroughly destroyed his own happiness by making countless mistakes.

Right before the plane landed, Edward looked at me with his beautiful golden eyes, and concluded our debate with words so smooth they stopped my train of thought completely. “Besides, Romeo and Juliet had a tragic ending. You and I are a forever thing. We’re eternal. There will be no tragedy, no ending. Romeo lost his Juliet, but I’ll never lose my Bella.” He looked down at me lovingly, and reiterated the word never in a factual tone.

I wondered for a second if a vampire’s cold, granite-like body could turn to mush and melt into the seat? I had to look down to make sure my body was intact, thanks to Edward and his ability to send my mind into a complete haze and make my body feel like melting snow.

When we got off the plane, we picked up the rental car—which surprisingly wasn’t fancy, shiny, or insanely expensive. It looked like the type of car you would see a busy mother driving her children to soccer practice in. I laughed to myself at the image of Edward behind the wheel of such an effeminate car.

We didn’t drive far, just outside the city limits on the north side of Chicago. Edward parked the car and we ran for a short time until we reached the most gorgeous cemetery I have ever seen. It was huge, and full of architectural masterpieces. The cemeteries I have seen were usually row-after-row of tomb stones, some larger than others—but these were capacious monuments.

Edward took my hand and we slowly, almost glidingly, walked over the perfectly landscaped grass. I knew exactly where we were, and what we were doing here, but I didn’t know what emotion to feel. I wasn’t sure how Edward felt, either. Mind reading would have come in handy right about now.

When we reached the gravestone of Elizabeth Masen, I felt honored to be this close to the woman who created the love of my life. And the woman responsible for demanding that Carlisle save him.

My memory is vague, but I do recall certain parts of Carlisle’s story. Elizabeth demanded that he do everything in his power to save Edward during the 1918 Spanish influenza pandemic. He described her eyes as, “hard, like stones, like emeralds.” Carlisle believes that Elizabeth knew that he was different, somehow. Edward’s life was slipping away with each tick of the clock, but because of his mother’s demand, he was here with me, standing beside me, looking down at the ground of her grave.

“I haven’t been here in a while,” Edward began, his face now expressionless. “I wanted you to come with me so I could have the chance to introduce you to my mother in the best way I can. I have never been more grateful for her telling Carlisle to save me than I am now. Because of her, I get to live an eternity with you, Bella. I get to be happy every day. The type of happiness that will never end.” His eyes darted back towards the beautiful gravestone.

I thanked Edward, countless times, for bringing me somewhere that meant so much to him. For letting me have the chance to get so close to a part of his life from before he became an immortal. He doesn’t remember Elizabeth very well, but he will forever have a connection to her. Although he may have resented the fact that he never got to make the choice to be turned, he is now gratified.

We didn’t stay long. It was just long enough to pay our respects. I left the cemetery feeling closer to Edward than I ever thought possible. Honored. Maybe even a little shocked. I didn’t see this coming. He really did surprise me this time.

The next day was Christmas and we couldn’t wait to give Renesmee her present. Edward picked it out. It wasn’t something she could actually use, but Edward didn’t care, he couldn’t wait to buy his daughter her first car. Although the 2011 Mercedes-Benz E-Class Cabriolet isn’t available to buy until May, 2010, Edward worked his magic and got one in ‘frosty blue’ for Renesmee. Her eyes lit up . . . with confusion. She loved the color, and the fact that it was sparkly, but in her sweet, soft voice she whispered, “I can’t use this. I don’t have a license, Daddy.” Luckily I stocked up on real presents. Things she can actually use. And Alice, of course, got her a lot of pretty things to wear.

We all called Jacob, who was in La Push with his family, and wished them all a Merry Christmas. We wanted Jake to know that, even though he was gone for the day, we were still thinking of him.

The Denali’s were fun. They adore Nessie, and although it’s gross for me to think about, Tanya had fun flirting with Charlie. They got along really well, and it’s great to see Charlie’s face light up. After all, he is a terminal bachelor . . . famous ladies man, as he calls himself.

Tanya remembered Charlie from the wedding, and of course asked about his change. He told her the entire story and she nearly melted when he explained that he became a vampire to save me. Great. Now he’s using the story of how he became a vampire to save his vampire daughter from being killed by a coven of vampires to impress women. Vampire women. I still believe that there are things about my new life that I will never get used to.

I have to go for now; Seth is visiting and I want to spend as much time as possible with him before he goes back to La Push. I will write again soon, like I always do.





Dear Diary (Vampire Snowball Fights)

The things I abhorred the most when I was a human, are the things I seem to miss the most now that I’m an immortal, a vampire. Oddly, I miss the feeling of snowflakes melting against my warm cheeks. I miss feeling my face go entirely numb from the sharp, frosty wind. When I first moved to Forks I wanted to move right back out  because of the constant cold, and the lack of sunlight . I undoubtedly miss the contrast in temperature between mine and Edward’s skin, too.

Edward used to feel so cold to me, so icy. His body felt hard, like granite. It’s different when we touch now. Not bad, but different. I know there are things that Edward misses about me being human, too. I am selfish to think that the changes have only impacted me. I’m also feel selfish for wanting this life so badly, for forcing Edward to turn me, then having the nerve to miss parts of being how I used to be. Being human. I pretty much begged Edward to turn me, so I can learn to deal with the fact that for as long as I exist, I will never be human again.

Thankfully a lot of things are extremely vague. I have forgotten a lot about the people and events that were not that important to me, but I do still remember the things that really mattered. It’s almost like I have snap shots in my head, permanently, but they are partially unclear. Blurry. Almost as though whoever took the photos moved the camera too fast, making the photo cloudy. But I can still see them. I do still remember what Edward’s ice cold hand felt like in my warm, often clammy hand. I remember making up my mind that I was going to be with Edward, for forever, no matter what it took. My transformation did not blur any of the feelings I felt for Edward – if anything, they just got more intense, more clear.

It’s almost Christmas time, and the Cullen’s are going all out to make sure Charlie, Renesmee, Jacob and I have the time of our lives. Alice decorated the entire house, with a little bit of help  from the rest of us. Alice is picky, though. Everything has to be done perfectly, so we only help when she asks for it. Emmett, Charlie and Jasper strung the lights all around the house. Alice almost forgot that it might look odd if she was on the icy, cold roof herself, stringing the lights despite the fact that we have a house full of men, or… I guess you could call them manpires. No need to draw attention to ourselves.

Carlisle and Esme have invited the Denali’s over to celebrate Christmas. They accepted the invite and are anxious to meet Charlie. It should be interesting trying to explain Charlie’s perpetually, almost eerie crimson eye color – unless, of course, he chooses to wear his contacts. Come to think of it, he probably will. He seems to get somewhat embarrassed by the color of his eyes. After all, they are similar to the color of a non-vegetarian’s eyes, only more disturbing.

Jacob and Renesmee have gotten closer than ever in the past few weeks. Their relationship is changing, maturing. Edward is pleased to see that Jacob’s thoughts about his future with Nessie are still completely pure. Although Renesmee is only three years old, she has the mind and body of a ten year old, so it is inevitable that her relationship with Jacob is maturing. They spend more time laughing and joking with each other and enjoy a lot of the same things. Jacob no longer reads to Nessie before she falls asleep. Instead, they stay awake and joke until she drifts off, then Jacob heads out back to his home to sleep.

One of Renesmee’s favorite things in the entire world is snow. We have had heaps of snow fall so far here and her and Jake spend hours outside every day playing in it. It’s funny to watch Renesmee so effortlessly beat Jake when they have snowball fights. He can be a sore loser sometimes. It’s especially funny when Jacob claims he ‘let her win’ because she’s a girl. Sure, Jake.

If you have ever wondered what a vampire snowball fight is like, I can tell you one thing – you’re missing out. I had my first vampire snowball fight a week ago. Due to the lack of snow in our usual clearing, the one we use for baseball, we had to scout out a new field. We ended up finding a perfect spot just outside of Hanover. Similar to the clearing where we play baseball, this field was sheltered by trees. There was a small, gravel road in the distance, so we did have to be a little more careful.

The most fun part about a vampire snowball fight is that the snowballs get thrown with such intense speed that they usually disintegrate before they reach their target – if you’re fast enough that is. The biggest competition usually ends up being between Edward and Emmett because Edward is fast, really fast – but Emmett is strong and can throw hard. I would say that Edward ended up getting hit about half time time. There is no winning and losing in a vampire style snowball fight, though. No one is keeping score.

The game ended a lot sooner than I thought it would have. We ended up using all the snow quite fast, leaving the field completely bare. I hope no one decided to visit the mysterious, snowless field after we were done. That would be just great. Our family moves into town and suddenly all the snow in random large fields goes missing. I wonder what everyone’s theory about us would be.

As excited as I am about our snowball fights, I am more excited about what Edward has planned for Christmas Eve. He told me that we are doing something special, alone, the day before Christmas. I don’t get as worried about surprises as I used to – not when they’re from Edward. I still don’t like when people make a fuss over me, but Edward has a way of making me feel as though he is somehow benefiting from the surprise too. He tells me all the time that his happiness comes entirely from seeing me smile. Seeing me happy. I let Edward in my head often to show him what, exactly, his smile does to me. Lets just say he knows the feeling is mutual. My happiness heavily relies on seeing Edward smile and knowing, that somehow, I’ve made his life better.

Jacob is going back to La Push for Christmas day to be with Billy and the rest of his family, but will be returning as soon as the Denali’s leave New Hampshire. He plans to bring Seth back home with him for a visit, too. I look forward to seeing Seth. He’s a great kid and I will be forever grateful for all of his help. I do plan to take a trip to La Push to visit everyone soon, too.

La Push was pretty much my second home when Edward left. Again, the memories are vague, but even thinking of that time, when Edward left, it makes me want to grab onto him and hold him so tight and never let him go. I know that he would never leave again. I’m no longer breakable to him, fragile. But I can’t help feeling hollow when I think back to when he was gone.

I have to go for now. Rosalie, Alice, Esme and I are going Christmas shopping for Emmett, Jasper, Carlisle and Edward. What do you get for the people who have, or could have anything they want?

I also want to say Happy Holidays to all those who celebrate from all of the Cullens! We hope you all have a safe and happy holiday season.





New Eclipse set photos (Peter Facinelli films with the wolves)

eclipse movie, peter facinelli Peter Facinelli filming Eclipse Carlisle Cullen in La Push Peter Facinelli filming Eclipse with the wolf pack

Check out the above pictures that RadarOnline got of Peter Facinelli filming scenes for Eclipse with the werewolves! Hehe, oh the Carlisle hair, love it.

(thanks Stef’ :))

EDIT: here are some more pics from the Eclipse set of the wolves and Peter Facinelli…

I love how the wolves are all in bath robes, lol. Click here to see more.



More Photos of the La Push gang… (untagged)

Alex Rice, Eclipse Movie Julia Jones, Eclipse The Movie, La Push Boo Boo Stewart, Seth Clearwater Gil Birmingham, Billy Black

Here are some more pictures of the La Push gang arriving in Vancouver to film their scenes for the Eclipse movie! How adorable is Boo Boo Stewart?




Dear Diary (Drama: Vampire Style)

I should have mentioned it to them… all of them. I didn’t want Rosalie, Emmett, Jasper or Baylor to become angry with me, so I didn’t tell them of my plans to let Charlie know about what I’ve become.

Alice, Esme, Edward and, of course, Carlisle were the only ones I told.

After Edward called Carlisle to come help with Charlie and his fainting episode, Carlisle then called Esme at the Cullen house to let her know he would be late. He briefly explained what had happened to Charlie. Esme was on the home office phone thinking no one could hear her when she asked Carlisle, “Does Charlie know about Bella now?” Followed up by, “He fainted after she showed him her skin? Is he okay?”
Rosalie overheard the entire thing.


My return to the Cullen house after that was less welcoming than the very first time I had ever visited, as a human. As soon as Edward, Nessie and I walked through the door, I heard a low heinous growl. Alice glided over to us and whispered the words I was afraid of: “They know.”

I didn’t have a second to ask Alice any questions before Rosalie was face-to-face with me, her lips pulled over her perfect teeth. Edward and Alice crouched in front of me, Edward letting out a deep, threatening growl. It’s odd how they’re all so quick to forget that I’m technically stronger than any of them, because I am a newborn. No matter what, though, Edward will eternally feel protective of me.

Rosalie didn’t give me a second to explain before she started to interrogate me.
“What will you do when the Volturi find out, Bella?”
“Did you even think to run this past the rest if us?”

Then the last question, and this one hurt. “How could you risk your own daughters’ life like that?”

Edward’s voice echoed off the white walls as he lashed back at Rosalie. Somehow, this turned into a brawl between just the two of them. But I couldn’t let it be this way. This was my fault. I began a feeble attempt to explain myself, but Edward’s voice drowned mine out and Rosalie wouldn’t even look at me, anyway.

Jasper, Emmett and Baylor were completely siding with Rosalie, and even questioned my commitment to the family. Esme and Carlisle swiftly leaped down the stairs at this point, and Carlisle asked that we discuss this in a more “respectable manner.”

Rosalie kept going with the jabs and questions, though. She was unrelenting, to say the least. “Why should we respect Bella when she can’t follow a simple rule?” she hissed, her eyes refusing to leave my face as she spoke.

I tried and tried to reassure them all that Charlie wouldn’t tell a soul. I tried to explain how hard it was to have a living human family member who I had to lie to every single day; how hard it was to no longer be able to spend much time with Charlie, and to have no explanation for him when he simply asks me why.

I could see Emmett was beginning to moderately understand my points. He placed his arm around Rosalie, who was still giving me that cadaverous glare. Jasper was clearly enraged, too. Lucky for me, though, Alice was quick to rebuttal anything he said, in my defense. Alice was great at seeing both sides of everything.

Edward was half–arguing with people’s thoughts, and half arguing their actual spoken words, which got confusing.

At one point everyone was growling over each other, no one listening to one another, when Nessie slowly walked towards Rosalie and placed one hand on her cheek.
Rosalie’s face slowly relaxed, her eyes seeming less lethal, less threatening. Edward had already read Rosalie’s thoughts and mumbled three quick words out loud: “Nessie is scared.”

In what seemed like a fraction of a moment, Baylor hurried upstairs, Alice and Jasper went and sat in front of the television, Emmett and Rosalie stormed off into the garage, and Carlisle and Esme took Nessie into the backyard and called Jacob to come be with her.

Edward and I stood in the front lobby of the house, stunned, staring at each other. I didn’t know what to say. I couldn’t take it back. Charlie already knew.

In one instantaneous move, Edward placed his arm around me, holding me in his tight, protective grip. I placed my head on his shoulder and let him into my mind. I needed him to see how truly horrible I felt for any danger I’ve caused Cullen’s, and how regretful I was for posing any danger on our beautiful little Nessie. Our angel.

I just wish they could have seen and placed as much trust in Charlie as I did. I’d been back to Charlie’s house, and gave him the long version of our story – once he was sitting down, of course.

He wont tell a soul. I know he wont.

Another thing, too, is that Charlie’s line of work has required him to keep numerous secrets from the towns’ people on many occasions. He’s used to keeping secrets. Besides, he knows we could all get destroyed if word got out; Charlie would never do anything to cause that to happen. I’m his daughter, he wants to protect me.

Before I could finish my train of thought, Baylor almost silently flew down the stairs with the one small khaki colored bag he had brought with him, walked past Edward and I – without even glancing at us – and flew out the door.

Alice daintily walked back into the lobby from the T.V. room, her eyes focused, her body graceful, yet tense. I swiftly glanced at Edward, who was giving Alice a knowing stare. Alice was having a vision and I knew it wasn’t good.

Alice and Edward took me outside, where no one could hear us, and told me that Baylor was going to the Volturi.

To Be Continued…




Dear Diary (Getting Acquainted)

I had a chance to spend some one–on–one time with Baylor. Edward also had his chance. Not surprisingly, Edward and I have different opinions about him. Maybe it’s my eternal optimism, but I really like Baylor. He seems genuine, interestingly complex, and quite gentle.

Edward questions his motives, of course. When Edward is unable to read someone’s thoughts, he becomes intrigued, yet annoyed. He isn’t used to having to work to understand people. It’s not that Edward thinks Baylor is bad, he is just being cautious.

When Baylor and I spent time together, he told me all about his mother, about how he was turned and the human memories he manages to recall from his past. I didn’t have the heart to tell him that I already knew about his mother and how he was turned – from Edward, through Carlisle’s thoughts – so I listened to his story, again.

Baylor was very friendly, and seemed sincere. I told him my story, and of course couldn’t help but talk about Edward, my love. I even explained Renesmee to him. It took some convincing, but I think he finally understands. He had never heard of a half–human, half–vampire.

Now he has.

Nessie seems to like Baylor a lot, too. She showed him her thoughts. They were of her and Jacob, of course. This brought up some questions that I wasn’t ready to answer.

“Who is this boy she’s showing me, Bella?” Baylor asked, intrigued.


I wasn’t quite sure how to get him to understand this part. I began to tell him about the Volturi, and their attempt to attack us, and kill Nessie. From there, I explained that, prior to me becoming a vampire, I had a good friend who I loved dearly, named Jacob. I explained how Jacob helped me when Edward left, then just came out with it.

I sucked in a deep breath before I spoke, letting the words out with the air. “Jacob… is a wolf.”

Baylor’s expression was actually calm, almost knowing. One of his eyebrows raised out of interest, so I continued, feeling more confident this time. I explained to Baylor that Jacob has imprinted on Renesmee, and what that will entail. He asked a few questions, but didn’t seem shocked.

I thought about it for a moment, and realized that after everything he has been through, realistically, nothing should shock Baylor anymore. I mean, his mother got turned into a vampire, who then turned him into a vampire. Really, I think he’s used to this world of ‘mythical’ creatures.

I was really happy I had the chance to spend time with Baylor. He is part of our family now, after all. Emmett and Rosalie are going to take him hunting tomorrow, to get acquainted. Emmett should show him an interesting time. He has a way with opening people up and making them feel like family, almost instantly.

For tonight, Edward and I are going to be spending the night alone. Nessie is actually with Sue, at Charlie’s house. Sue said she thinks Nessie is contributing to Charlie’s healing process greatly, and wanted to have her there, to keep Charlie smiling. He adores Renesmee. So does Sue.

I’m off to spend all night long talking, laughing and cuddling with Edward. Sometimes I feel like so much is going on that we forget to take time for ourselves. He is my world, and I am so grateful to have found him. Everything between us still feels new and exciting. Edward does something everyday that makes me fall more in love with him. Right now, he’s looking at me with with the most mesmerizing look on his face. His eyes are a golden butterscotch and his grin is lovingly turned up on the right side. I’m going to go now, have some fun with my love. My life.

Write again soon.





Dear Diary (Update)

I couldn’t see straight when Carlisle told me that Charlie had flat lined.

He only flat lined for a quarter of a second before Carlisle was able to bring him back, though. Dr. Cullen works wonders. He is the most amazing doctor around, and I am truly so thankful for him.

The bad news? Charlie has an infection where the bullet was lodged. He is taking antibiotics and Carlisle is keeping a very close eye on him.

We all are.

I am so grateful for Sue, too. She has been with Charlie the entire time, never leaving his side. When she thought no one was watching, she would begin to lightly cry while holding his hand.

Charlie sleeps most of the day, in his hospital bed. He has to stay there until the infection clears up. It’s important for him to relax and for his infection to be monitored closely.

I’m so grateful that my Dad is still alive. If he only knew what I did to the people that did this to him. If he only knew what I was. I wish I could tell him. I wish I could tell Charlie that I am his vampire daughter, and that Nessie is his half-vampire, half-human granddaughter. I’m a bad liar, always have been. I think if Charlie were to ever ask me about it, I would be honest. I know that no matter what, he would love me. Besides, Alice had a vision of him finding out in the near future. I know it’s forbidden, but Charlie wouldn’t ever reveal what he knew. Not if he knew it could hinder us in any way.

My Mother, Renee, went back to Phoenix this morning as soon as she found out that Charlie would be okay. She had obligations there, with Phil. During her visit, I avoided her as much as possible. I knew she would notice my changes. I knew she would question me.

And she did. “Bella, your face is somehow more pale than usual. And you look like you’ve been working out a lot. And what’s with your eyes?”

Oh boy.

I really began to appreciate Charlies ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ motto. Basically, I just told Renee that I’d been working out with Edward, and mentioned that we had bigger things – like Charlie – to worry about. She could tell I didn’t want to talk about myself during this tough time, and quickly let it go.


Edward, Alice and I are due for a hunt soon. We’re going to go out tomorrow once Esme, Nessie and Jake come for their shift at the hospital. We’re all taking shifts, and pretending we have to go home to sleep. We have to try to remember to do human things, and fit in with normal human behavior.

Right now, though, I’m going to grab Nessie and Edward then head over to be with Charlie. Carlisle said his heart rate speeds up when he senses that I’m there. It makes him happy. I will keep you posted on Charlie’s progress, of course.

I have to run now. Edward is giving me that look that somehow instantly melts my granite-like body. The one that tells me he wants to kiss me really bad.