Charlie’s eyes are still a startling crimson color. They haven’t faded, at all. Unusual. In fact, they seem to be becoming more bright with time. He only drinks the blood of animals, and hasn’t ever fed off a human, ever. Normally, only vampires who drink human blood – and, of course, newborns – have such a frighteningly red eye color. Mine are now completely golden, and turn black when I’m extremely hungry.
Wearing contacts around all the time isn’t a realistic option for Charlie. He hates them. Sunglasses just look suspicious. It’s Forks after all. Always gloomy – no need for sunglasses. Although Charlie likes to joke that he’s “defected,” I’m actually worried. Unlike humans, our kind have not been studied so in depth. Even Carlise is uncertain as to why Charlie’s eyes are still the same burning shade of red they were the first day he became one of us, if not brighter.
We have to move, too. Carlisle doesn’t want to go to New Hampshire until we figure out what it is that’s keeping Charlie’s eyes from turning golden. He doesn’t see the point in causing suspicion about what we are in two different towns. If the good people of Hanover, New Hampshire were to somehow see Charlie’s eyes, we would have to leave immediately. We’re going to remain here, in Forks, until Carlisle can fully understand why Charlie is different from the rest of us.
As of right now, Carlise only has one theory. And so far, it’s nothing more than just a theory, either. When Charlie was shot in the line of duty, Carlisle had to operate. Charlie was left with an infection in his chest, extremely close to his heart. Carlisle thinks that maybe – because part of Charlie’s heart was calloused from the wound – the venom couldn’t spread throughout his entire heart. Therefore Charlie could still have some blood flowing through his body. Not a lot, or enough to consider him “alive” – but enough to keep his eyes a flaming, almost liquid ruby color.Enough for him to still have a extraordinarily feeble heart beat.
Until Carlisle does some sort of test, we wont know for certain, though. It’s extremely confusing not only to Carlisle, but to all of us. Charlie only craves blood, and like any other vampire, he can’t stand the taste of food and describes it as tasting like “dirt” or “mud.” He’s strong, fast, cold-skinned and even has a gift. Everything else is the same, except his eyes.
I don’t mind that our move has been delayed. It wont be put off for too long, anyway. Carlisle will work fast to figure this out – and when he does, I’ll be sure to let you all know if his theory was indeed right – or if there’s some other hidden reason. Right now, I only care about Charlie’s safety. Carlisle is almost one hundred percent sure that Charlie is okay, but I know I’ll be a nervous wreck until I know for sure. Until something has been confirmed, proven.
In other news, Renee wants to come visit… without Phil. She called today and the tone of her voice was somewhat dreary. When I asked if everything was okay, she assured me that everything was “fine,” but I know Renee better than that. When I asked about Phil – and why he wasn’t coming – she danced around my questions and gave me quick, mindless responses.
I told her I would get back to her about a good time to visit. Told her I needed to talk to the family to make sure everyone agreed on a date. Really, I’m just buying some time to figure out how, exactly, we’re going to work her into a house full of vampires – and somehow keep it a secret, and keep her alive. We’ll probably have her visit at Charlie’s house in town, and just have Charlie, Edward, Renesmee and myself stay with her at the house, while Carlise, Esme, Rosalie, Emmett, Jasper, Alice – and of course Jacob – stop in for a visit or two.
I know Renee will ask questions, and notice that we do things that normal humans don’t, but I’m prepared to handle anything she throws my way. I wont make the same mistake I did with Charlie, by telling him what we are. I wont risk our lives, or hers. She can suspect what she wants, but I’ll never admit to anything and will do whatever it takes to hide the truth. Anything. For her safety, and the safety of the rest of my family.
For now I’m going to go read the ending of my favorite book, Edward’s Diary. I’m almost completely through the second one. I have to say, if it were possible for me to cry – the pages of that diary would be nothing but wet, smeared ink. Sometimes I find myself re-reading certain lines that Edward wrote about me; trying to digest the emotion behind every word. Of course, I’ll eventually post more entries from Edward, too.
Will Write Again Soon,
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This is an amazing video depicting the story of Rosalie Cullen done by frankfart101!
*SPOILERS* The video shows how Rosalie grew up in the 1930′s and how she was abused and nearly killed by her fiancee, Royce Rochester and his friends until Carlisle saved her by turning her into a vampire.
In fact, he is pretty much in disbelief. It was expected, though. I had a difficult time actually saying what I am. Oddly, when I tried to say the word vampire to Charlie, it got caught in my throat, wouldn’t come out. Edward had to finish my sentence for me. Then, after Edward blurted it out, I actually considered denying it… until I realized how crazy that would have made Edward seem. It didn’t help that Charlie asked Edward to repeat himself, four times.
The funny thing is, when I say that I’m a vampire out loud, I start to question my own sanity. All the myths and stereotypes I heard growing up left me with a distorted view of what a vampire really is. If I learn to let go of those preconceived notions, I think I will start to accept – and more readily believe – that I am, in fact, a vampire.
The whole time we were explaining ourselves to Charlie, Edward could, of course, read his thoughts. This was very frustrating for me because I wanted so badly to know what Charlie was really thinking. I didn’t want to make him scared or uncomfortable in anyway. Edward shot me the odd reassuring glance to let me know everything was okay, thankfully.
Charlie spent the majority of the conversation with his hand wrapped tightly around his Rainier beer, his knuckles turning whiter than mine. A few beads of sweat drizzled down his face, and his chest heaved up and down as his heart rate sped up.
Once we finished talking, we asked him if we could step outside in the back yard, while the sun was still shining, to show him how our skin glistens. He said he’d “rather not.”
We went outside anyway, though. His curiosity got the best of him, and he followed us. I was wearing a loose fitting, short–sleeved peach colored dress, cut just below my knee. As soon as I stepped out into the sun, Charlie’s eyes lit up and his face had so many inexplicable expressions.
I was petrified.
Again, Edwards mind–reading would have come in handy for me. I didn’t know if Charlie thought it was beautiful, or completely horrific. Then, he said it, he answered my question as though he could read my mind. “Bells, you’ve always been my beautiful little girl. This though, this is angelic. You… you’re gorgeous.”
Then Charlie collapsed.
Edward was on the phone to Carlisle, seemingly before Charlie even hit the ground. Later Edward explained he heard Charlie say he was feeling “extremely light–headed” in his thoughts.
I was extremely worried about Charlie, but I was more upset over the fact that I couldn’t do anything for him. I couldn’t risk getting that close to him. I still don’t know my own strength.
One wrong move, and I could kill Charlie.That thought scared me more than anything.
Edward and I hadn’t been hunting in a while, either. My throat felt like sandpaper that had been lit on fire. I knew I had control, for the most part, but I didn’t want to risk anything.
Luckily Carlisle arrived very shortly after Edward had called. Charlie was slipping in-and-out of consciousness the whole time, saying things that didn’t make sense. Carlisle worked his magic and had Charlie back in the house, in his bed, sipping some sort of fluid that had electrolytes in it.
For obvious reasons, I decided to hold off on telling Charlie about Nessie. One thing at a time. Before we left, though, we explained to Charlie that he couldn’t tell a soul. And, I gave him a brief description of the Volturi. He was half–listening to me and half glancing quickly from Edward to Nessie and back to me in disbelief. I told him to rest and figured I would tell him the rest once he recovered from the shock of everything.
I kissed him on the head, then left.
Carlisle stayed behind for a few hours to watch over Charlie, even though Charlie claimed to be “just fine.” Though all of this was very dramatic, the real drama didn’t start until Edward, Nessie and I returned to the Cullen house. I have a few things I need to take care of right now, but I will write again soon and let you know exactly what happened once we got back from out visit with Charlie.
Remember my 1953 Chevrolet pickup truck? The one Charlie bought for me from Billy Black when I moved to Forks? Well, if you’ve been following my story, you would know that Edward purchased me an “after car,” for when I was turned.
It’s a beautiful car. It’s fast, too. Different from my old pickup truck, to say the least. It’s a Ferrari F430. Nice to look at, but Edward always knew I missed my old pickup truck. It’s been parked on Charlie’s lawn for the longest time. To my disappointment, it stopped running. I thought I’d never get to drive it again, until Edward surprised me with it today.
It’s not exactly the same as before, though. It’s faster, stronger and has a polished exterior. Reminds me of myself now, oddly. Edward compared the old version of my truck to the human version of myself. It was strong, yet so fragile at the same time. It was rusty, kinda how I was on my feet. And, it was constantly on the verge of dying, only to be made into something faster, stronger and more beautiful, also like me.
Edward redoing my truck is somewhat symbolic of the new me. Its paint is glossy and sparkles in the sunlight, it drives fast, it’s strong, runs quietly but most importantly, it’s still the same truck, just like I’m still the same Bella.
Besides Nessie, this has to be the best surprise I have ever received in my life. Edward knows how much I love my truck, and he wants me to preserve a lot of my human qualities. The qualities that – along with my scent – made him fall in love with me.
Charlie and Jacob were in on my surprise too. They helped Edward with ideas. It was Charlie’s idea to put tires on the truck that are strong enough to trek through quick sand… for my safety, of course. Charlie still worries about me. He has no idea about my strength, speed or, well… that I’m his vampire daughter.
I’m so very happy to have this part of me back. It brings back very vague memories of my first day at Forks High School. Thinking I was going to be miserable and depressed during my entire time here. Wishing the rain would just dry up and the sun would shine like in Phoenix. And most importantly, wondering who the beautiful golden–haired boy was who took my breathe away. Now, I no longer have to wonder. He is my life, and I am his.
Rosalie, Emmett, Edward and I are going hunting tomorrow. Nessie is going to stay with Esme and Carlisle while we’re gone. They love spending time with her and she adores them equally.
Well, I think I’ve completed a successful diary entry for tonight. I’m going to go have some “bonding” time with Edward while Renesmee is asleep. I’ll be sure to write again tomorrow.